9 Best Life Lessons I Learned From Gram

Gram’s Wisdom 56

There is something exceptional about grandmothers. They seem to have a knack for making you feel special. Grandmothers always know how to make their grandchildren smile. They love to laugh and have a good time with them. Grandmothers are also the most loving people, always ready to offer a hug or a listening ear.

Grandmothers have often faced many challenges in their lives, but they have always endured. They are strong and resilient, and they never give up. Despite their strength, grandmothers are also gentle and kind. They have a wealth of experience and wisdom to share, and their words of wisdom can stay with us for a lifetime. 

My Gram’s words have been rattling around in my brain for 60 years. They are the same words I use with my grandson. They are the same words I have been sharing in these Gram’s wisdom posts. She once told me, “How we do things changes, the reasons for doing them never change.”

Here are some life lessons that anyone’s grandmother might have passed on:

Be neat and orderly.

Keeping your home clean, neat, and orderly is timeless advice. A devotion to cleanliness isn’t just about surprise guests popping in; there are many benefits to an organized household. These benefits include less stress, more motivation, and productivity.

• A cluttered and messy home can be a source of stress. A clean and organized home, on the other hand, can provide a sense of calm and order. This can help to reduce stress levels and improve your overall mood.

• When your home is clean and organized, you're more likely to feel motivated to get things done. A cluttered space can be distracting and make it difficult to focus. A clean and organized space, on the other hand, can help you to stay on task and be more productive.

Are you looking for ways to improve your mental and physical health, reduce stress, and boost your productivity? Then keeping your home clean, tidy, and organized is a great place to start. Just begin by decluttering one area at a time and make it your habit of putting things away after you use them. (Remember: trying is more important than perfection.)

Be punctual.

Show others you respect their time by arriving on time. Besides being polite, it allows you to pull yourself together and be ready for the meeting, appointment, or visit.

• When you arrive on time, you show the other person that you value their time and you are reliable. It’s also a demonstration that you are prepared and organized and you can manage your time effectively.

• You build trust with others: When you are always on time, people know they can count on you. This can be especially important in professional settings, where trust is essential.

Being punctual is a skill that takes practice, but it is worth it. Set a reminder to leave ten minutes earlier than you normally would. Arriving on time, or even a little bit early, is a simple way to make a good impression. You also set yourself up for success in both your personal and professional life.

Treat others with consideration.

Be flexible in your interactions with people. Different people might require a slightly different approach. They will appreciate the effort, and you will sharpen your people skills.

• Different people have different communication styles and needs. For example, some people prefer to be direct and to the point, while others prefer a more gentle and indirect approach. It's important to adapt your communication style to the individual you're interacting with.

• Being flexible shows you're interested in the other person. When you take time to understand how they communicate and what they need, it shows you're paying attention and that you care about what they have to say. This can build trust and rapport, which leads to more productive and enjoyable interactions.

Connect with people on a personal level and tailor your message to their needs. This can help you to build strong relationships, be more persuasive, and be successful in your career.

Love yourself.

Everyone has their struggles, but never forget to love yourself. Treat yourself like you would treat a loved one. Avoid negative self-talk and don’t attempt to be someone else. You are your person, and that person is special!

• Self-love is essential for mental and physical health. When you love yourself, you are more likely to take care of your physical and mental health. You are also more likely to make healthy choices, such as eating a healthy diet, exercising regularly, and getting enough sleep.

• Self-love is the foundation of healthy relationships. When you love yourself, you are more likely to have healthy relationships with others. You are less likely to be codependent or to attract toxic people into your life.

If happiness and success are what you seek, it is important to love yourself. Treat yourself with kindness and compassion. Skip the negative self-talk and focus on your strengths and your accomplishments.

Rough times come – but they pass.

Nothing lasts forever. Neither good times nor bad times. So, acknowledge that you will face rough times, but they will not last. Take time to lick your wounds, but eventually, you will need to pick yourself up and move forward. 

• Everyone experiences rough times at some point. It’s okay to feel sad, angry, or frustrated when you are going through a rough time. Don't try to ignore your emotions; that just makes them worse. Instead, allow yourself to feel what you are feeling, and then let it go.

If you are going through a rough time, remember you are not alone. Don't let it consume you. Just continue taking things one day at a time. Eventually, the tough times will pass, and you will be stronger.

Practice good manners. 

Using good manners doesn’t cost anything and brings harmony to your relationships. Remember to say “Please” and “Thank You” and, in general, be considerate of those around you.

1| Good manners make you more likable.

People are more likely to be drawn to and to like you if you practice good manners. This can be helpful in both your personal and professional life.

2| Good manners are a show of respect:

When you use good manners, you show respect for the other person. This can help to build positive relationships and to create a more harmonious environment.

3| Be considerate of others' feelings and needs.

This means things like holding the door open for someone. Allowing someone to go ahead of you in line. And not talking over someone when they are speaking.

4| Be mindful of your surroundings.

This means things like not talking loudly in public, not littering, and not blocking walkways.

5| Apologize when you make a mistake:

Everyone makes mistakes, but it is important to apologize when you do. This shows that you are aware of your mistake and that you are willing to make amends.

Stand by your convictions.

While you should strive to be pleasant and courteous, it is also important that you stand up for your convictions. Be assertive, not aggressive.

• If someone tries to push you around or make you feel bad about yourself, it is important to set boundaries and stand up for yourself. You can do this by calmly and respectfully explaining that you do not appreciate their behavior. You can also walk away from the situation if necessary.

Offer others the respect that you also deserve. It is important to remember that you are worthy of respect, regardless of what anyone else says. You shouldn’t let anyone make you feel like you are less worthy than they are.

Don’t fear failure. 

Lessons are found in your perceived failures. If you succeed at everything, you risk learning nothing. So go out and fail at something, learn the lesson, and become a better person. You will be more apt to reach your goals, too. 

• When you fail, you can learn from your mistakes. You can identify what went wrong and what you can do differently next time. This can help you to improve your skills and to become more successful.

• Failure can also make you more resilient. When you fail, you learn that you can overcome challenges. This can give you the confidence to try new things and to take risks.

• If you never fail, you will never learn and grow. You will never reach your full potential. So don't be afraid to fail. View it as a window for opportunity.

Failure is not something to be afraid of. It is a natural part of life, and it can be a valuable growth tool.

Cherish your family and friends.

Make family and friends a priority. A strong social circle gives you a firm foundation for success. In bad times and good, these are the people you will turn to. Make sure to foster powerful relationships, by ‘giving’ as much as you ‘take’.

• Family and friends can help you to achieve your goals. They can offer you advice, guidance, and motivation. They can also help you to stay accountable and to avoid giving up on your dreams.

• Family and friends make life more enjoyable. They are the people who you can share your joys and sorrows with. They are the people who you can laugh with and cry with. They make life more meaningful and more fun.

• Call a close relative. Have dinner with them and show them that you cherish that relationship.

If you want to be happy, healthy, and successful, make family and friends a priority. Make time for them and listen to them. Be generous to them and forgive them. And be there for them, and they will be there for you when you need them the most.

My final thoughts are.

The above bits of wisdom are simple maxims as true today as they ever were. They are meant to help us behave well and to get along with others. I have only one thing to add and that is be kind.

Thank you for taking the time to read this post.

For more information, check out these posts.

9 Pieces Of Life Advice From Your Grandma That You Should Actually Listen To.

Little Kindnesses Create Big Impacts.

Key Components For Life Balance And Harmony

Gram’s Wisdom 45 Balance is an action.

Gram told me life is about balance and most of us don’t manage it very well. From our personal lives to the office, through the natural world, and back home to our communities. The bad news is that it’s hard to be all and do all. The good news is no one expects it from you!

Gram felt that balance in life is not an act, but an action. Like many other parts of life, it’s a journey, not a destination. Her theory was that we should take action to move all the different parts of life forward, understanding that not all parts move at the same rate. Relax and play too long, and you could go hungry. Work too much and you put your health at risk.

Navigating the challenges of life can be an experience filled with many ups and downs. While seeking knowledge of specific topics is essential for success, Gram thought the nature of learning life skills should go wider than just learning how to find a job or pay the bills, important as they are. She believed you must also act on what you learn.

With that in mind, here are 10 actions you can take to add more balance to life.

Learning balance.

Balance is a learned quality that is about constantly improving. The value of seeking balance in all areas of life is that it can be the thin line between flying and falling. Imagine your quality of life if you dedicated 100% of your time to work and had no time for relaxation. The outcome may be a successful career, or it could be so much stress and exhaustion you have no life at all. In all aspects of life, balance can restore your energy while preserving your future.

One way this balance can be achieved is by practicing mindfulness. When considering your diet, are you being mindful of what you eat? When looking at your time spent on recreational activities, are you spending more time having fun rather than feeling you are neglecting your responsibilities?

Considering where you are putting your energy will help you to see where you need to make needed changes.

Mental balance.

The importance of protecting your mental health has never been a higher priority—and it has never been a more difficult task. The National Institute on Mental Health recommends getting regular exercise, prioritizing sleep, practicing gratitude, and staying connected to friends and family to help with mental health. If you have trouble sleeping or concentrating, have appetite changes that lead to weight change, or lose interest in activities that you usually enjoy, it’s time to seek help from a professional.

Emotional balance.

According to the Mental Health Foundation, emotional health is a “positive state of well-being which enables an individual to…meet the demands of everyday life.” It begins with identifying your emotions and holding them up to a mirror to determine their validity.

Emotions may at times tell you negative things, but by taking a step back and scrutinizing your thoughts you can realize that emotions are not facts—they are reactions. Balancing emotional health is about recognizing your strengths, realizing, and accepting your weaknesses, then moving forward with a positive perception.

Persistence and endurance.

Life is full of loveliness, but it is also filled with its fair share of challenges. Being able to endure tough circumstances is an essential part of survival. When a runner loses focus and grows tired during a race, she falls behind and eventually gives up.

Cultivating persistence involves staying focused on your end goal, and not allowing the distractions of life to blow you off course. One primary way to build your persistence and endurance is to completely immerse yourself in your goals. Educate yourself, stay motivated, and make your dream real. This will allow you to maintain your focus.

Create a spiritual practice of your own.

When your life is jam-packed with to-do lists and errands, it’s easy to neglect spiritual health. Cultivate your spiritual life by creating space in your schedule to sit quietly—in harmony with nature, if possible—and reflect on the deeper meaning of your life.

What is your purpose? Are your habits and activities working in harmony with that purpose? If not, consider how you might rearrange your priorities to create spiritual synergy in your life.

Physical balance.

Author and motivational speaker Jim Rohn once said, “Take care of your body. It’s the only place you have to live in.” Your body is a menagerie of working parts, and balancing your physical health can be overwhelming, so consider adopting these tips.

• Strive for a balanced circadian rhythm by going to bed and waking at roughly the same time each day.

• Take two 15- to 30-minute brisk walks every day.

• Strive to eat mostly foods that contain only one ingredient. A tomato is a tomato. An apple is an apple. Broccoli is broccoli. Removing processed foods from your diet will help your body remain balanced.

Relationship balance.

It seems you spend most of your life figuring out how to balance relationships. Siblings, parents, friends, and ultimately a spouse. The key to balancing relationships lies in your ability to nurture both yourself and your partner.

When you enter a committed relationship, it’s as if there are suddenly three lives to look out for: yours, your partners, and the life of the relationship you’re forming.

 These tips can help maintain a healthy relationship balance:

1. Listen: You have two ears and one mouth, so listen twice as often as you speak.

2. Communicate: When you do speak, positive and encouraging words build up your partner and your relationship.

3. Be Their Biggest Fan: Celebrate all your partner’s wins and let them know you think they are amazing.

4. Make Time: Pursue your interests and extend the same courtesy to your partner. Then create hobbies you can pursue together.

5. Become comfortable with your feelings and learn how to articulate them in a way that is respected. By doing so, you will get your needs met without feeling as if you must compromise.

Make your friends count.

Demanding careers plus the ability to work from home can cause our social lives to be put on the back burner.

If it’s been ages since you connected with friends, consider these tips to bring some fire back to your social life.

• Schedule It: If you’re someone who lives and dies by their calendar, then use that to your advantage and carve out regular time for social activities.

• Take a Device Break: Business emails and calls have a way of stealing from social time, so take advantage of the “Silence Notifications” feature and focus on the people who are right in front of you.

• Learn To Say No: If professional obligations are getting in the way of personal events that are important to you, evaluate your assignments and see if there are things that can be delegated. Don’t be afraid to share your situation with your boss—good bosses want happy, balanced employees who aren’t burned out by their jobs.

Community balance.

The world’s troubles are relentlessly beamed into your consciousness, and in most instances, you are powerless to help. However, you have immense power when you help an elderly shopper reach a product high on the shelf. Show empathy and kindness by checking on a sick neighbor to see if she needs anything from the store. Small acts of kindness and thoughtfulness in your community are a way to bring a healthy balance to the communities where you live—not to mention the positivity it contributes to your mental well-being.

Take ownership and responsibility.

One of the principal markings of maturity is the ability to take ownership of your actions. Every action comes with a set consequence, whether positive or negative. When making a choice that negatively affects yourself or others, do you have the maturity to own up to your mistakes and seek reconciliation?

When it comes to managing priorities, are you emphasizing taking care of your responsibilities first? Ownership and responsibility work hand in hand when it comes to growth. In addition, taking ownership of yourself demonstrates self-esteem and respect.

You will not succumb to unhealthy changes to appease others. You will know what you want out of life and accept nothing less. This encourages others to show you the same amount of respect.

My final thought.

Modern life, for most people, is frenetic. We are exposed to a numbing number of opportunities that come with a steep price. The cost for this is chronic stress and often a general dissatisfaction with our joyless lives.

A life of balance isn’t unreachable. Choose one small thing from the list above that you want to change and do it consistently. Watch and be amazed at the balance and harmony you can bring to your life.

Thank you for taking the time to read this post.

For more information, check out these posts.

5 Reasons You’re Struggling To Find Balance in Life.

Finding Harmony Within The Stillness.

You Are Worthy

Why do so many people find it hard to believe in their worthiness? After all, we go around spouting things like “you can do it”, only when they fail, they fall apart because they have no feeling or belief in their self-worth. Now, they are unsure of how many others are unworthy, but they are certain that they are unworthy. How do we recognize self-worth, and is it truly important?

Let’s explore this belief called self-worth.

The importance of self-worth

One of the best things you can do for yourself is to believe in your essential worth. If you don’t have an awareness of your worth, it can be difficult for you to connect with others at a level that is beneficial to them. Without this essential feeling of self-worth, you may allow yourself to settle for less than what you deserve in life.  

Your view of yourself can be hard to see

How you view yourself can be tricky to fix in your mind’s eye. So often you assume others have a clearer window to see who you are. Many people live their lives based on that false belief. Rather than, loving and respecting the person you are, you allow your self-worth to be dictated by who someone else believes you to be.

Reaching a high level of self-worth

Attaining a high level of self-worth may not be easy. But it brings with it satisfaction. Perhaps, you didn’t have the perfect parents to cheer you on. Not to worry. Self-worth can be learned from teachers, mentors, or friends. To help the learning process, don’t forget to dump the negative thinking, and negative talk, replace them with positive equivalents. 

The importance of self-worth in relationships

Self-worth is particularly important in relationships. A lack of value in yourself, will nearly always have you settling for less than you deserve in a partner because you can’t imagine meeting your “dream” partner and falling in love with them - or more accurately, you can’t believe they’d ever fall in love with you. This can lead you down a path that is not only unhealthy for you mentally, and emotionally, but physically as well.

Self-worth leads to better self-care

When you feel unworthy, you don’t see the importance of self-care. The trouble with this is the tailspin it can put you in. You think you don’t deserve to take the time for yourself. You begin to feel unwell. You talk negatively about yourself. Now you feel depressed. 

Instead, strive for a healthy level of self-worth. It will keep you cared for, loved, satisfied, and safe from unavoidable bumps in the road, that might otherwise bring you down. If your self-worth is intact and healthy, you become resilient.

“Our sense of self-worth is the single most determinant of the health, abundance, and joy we allow into our lives.”

— Dan Millman

Innate self-worth, is that even real?

Throughout our lives, we’re subject to good times and bad times, and each of these external events helps to develop our self-esteem. Self-worth, on the other hand, is something that happens internally, without the need for any external confirmation.

You are valuable

Your self-worth is inherent — it is the power of your belief that you have value because you are a human being. That you merit what you desire, and that you are inherently “good enough” to have it.

Another way to think of it is like this: failing at something will not affect your self-worth because you know that failure and success are simply two sides of the same coin — both of which you need in your experience to become a well-rounded person. Therefore, the worth you feel never changes — because you always know that you ARE worthy, no matter what.

You are worthy

You are born a worthy individual — it is simply a part of what makes you, you. You may increase that sense of worthiness at any time by taking actions to reinforce your self-worth beliefs. There are lots of things you can do to grow and maintain your self-worth, like taking care of yourself, getting exercise, being kind to yourself, and saying no when it feels right.

Innate self-worth means that you accept and honor yourself and the uniqueness that makes you different from everyone else. You know that no matter what, you are worthy of loving and being loved...simply because you ARE you.

The difference between self-worth and self-esteem

Self-worth and self-esteem...are they two different concepts? Many people use the two terms interchangeably, but others believe that these are two distinct and unique concepts entirely.

Let’s consider self-worth

How “worthy” or valuable do you believe you are? Do you feel you deserve the things you desire? The answer to these questions determines your self-worth.  It might surprise you to know that many gifted individuals have very low levels of self-worth and will subconsciously sabotage any potential success at the first opportunity.

Your self-worth is largely built up during your early childhood years. You’re essentially told what your worth is by your parents, how they act and react to you, and the quality of attention you get from them. If they have done well, you will treat yourself as if you’re valuable.

Setting realistic yet ambitious goals that stretch your limits shows you what you’re capable of achieving. Reaching those goals proves to you that you’re worth the result, thereby growing and maintaining a healthy sense of self-worth. And your success can be seen as anything that you’ve achieved that holds value for you, whether it’s a higher paying job, learning a new skill, or having healthy relationships.

Let’s talk about self-esteem

Your self-esteem can be determined by things outside yourself — like rejection. It instantly changes the way you think, and feel, about yourself. One of the best ways to reinforce your self-esteem is to surround yourself with supportive people who like and enjoy you and appreciate your unique talents and skills. Everyone deserves this treatment from those who are part of their inner circle.

When you take a hit to your self-esteem, the good news is — you can recover quickly by doing things you’re good at. By understanding that there are distinct things you are great at doing, that hit on your self-esteem will hurt less, and soon you’ll feel great again!

Building Your Self Worth

You are born with an innate sense of self-worth that you can build on and develop as you grow. There are five key components to building up your self-worth, and we’ll explore all five to find out a bit about each.

1 | Know and understand yourself — Knowing who you are inside has nothing to do with what you have or what you’ve done. It IS about knowing what makes you uniquely and unquestionably you. What do you love, what don’t you? What do you appreciate? What sorts of things and experiences do you value? A great question to ask that will help you understand what you value about yourself is: If everything I own, and everything I love, was taken from me tomorrow, and all I had was myself...what would I be able to offer the world?

2 | Accept yourself at this moment — Accepting yourself means valuing who you are in the present moment, irrespective of what you may have done in the past that you’d rather not think about. The good news is that you don’t have to think about it! Being able to accept yourself means no judgments, no looking back, and no looking forward. Just here and now, and who you are at this moment, including the good and the bad, the perfect and the flawed parts of yourself.

3 | Unreservedly love yourself — A very large part of increasing your self-worth is learning to love and care for yourself. Make sure you’re taken care of and that your needs are met. Practice positive and compassionate thinking about yourself, and yourself. This is where you let go of that negative self-talk, self-loathing, and negative thinking patterns. Everybody has flaws and faults. It helps make us who we are as individuals. But it doesn’t invalidate our value.

4 | Acknowledge yourself — This is where you begin to truly realize that everything external to you — has no bearing on who you are and what you are fundamentally worth to yourself and the world. When these external things no longer serve you, you must learn to let them go. Instead, you’ve grown a much stronger sense of self that no longer relies on these external things.

5 | You are accountable — Now, you are in command, and it is you and only you who is responsible for your actions, your life experiences, your challenges, and your unique situations. You have the necessary power to control your entire world.

My final thought

No matter who you are, or what you have been through, I believe that you are good enough, that you are strong enough, that you deserve your desires because you are born a worthy human being.

For more information, read the following post by Stephanie Jade Wong.

13 Things That Don’t Determine Your Self Worth

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Does Your Role Model Have A Positive Mindset?

Gram’s wisdom 31

For those of you who have been following along in my blog, you know how much I admired and depended on my Gram. She was my role model for more than fifty years. Even today the many things she taught me are a part of who I am. The lessons I learned from her were a gift to me. A gift that I am sharing with my grandson and you, my readers.

What is the role of a positive role model?

Having a role model who has a positive mindset makes a huge difference in your approach to life. It doesn’t matter who it is, or even if it’s more than one person. Multiple role models may be advantageous if you want to be well-rounded in life. The critical thing is they encourage and inspire you to do and be better.

The value of finding constructive role models is much more than having someone to look up to. You need someone who has been there and can show you a path that helps you live a more rewarding, fulfilling life.

In this article, I want to speak about the benefits of having positive role models. It’s also necessary that you know what makes good role models and how they can help you build a successful life.

The value of a good role model

There is an excellent quote by Corado I. Generoso who said, “No man is capable of self-improvement if he sees no other model but himself.”

You know you have a good role model when they have a strong set of core values. They don’t blame others for their mistakes but are willing to accept responsibility for them and learn from them. They will also apologize and find ways to make amends to the injured party.

Positive role models are resilient. Influencing your decisions for the better. When you’re going through a hard time, you look to them for support and encouragement. By emulating how they overcome obstacles, you can overcome them as well strengthening your resilience.

That guidance and sense of backing is an inspiration to work hard. Then, little by little, your true potential is revealed. You notice you’re doing things you once felt were impossibilities.

Below are some reasons why it’s important to find positive role models for your life.

Learn what you shouldn’t be doing

No one is ever right all the time or successful at everything they do. Not even the most fortunate or richest people.

The difference between them and others is they don’t stay down but know how to pick themselves up after a fall and continue moving forward. They understand that mistakes are just temporary bumps on the road to success. 

Positive role models see their mistakes as learning experiences. They make their mistakes work to their advantage. They become more aware of what to do next time and what not to do.

When you look at what others have done (or not done), it can be a huge motivator. It also gives you a sense of reassurance that you’re not alone that others have been through comparable situations. They’ve come out the other side in one piece, and a lot wiser and so can you.

Becoming a better version of you

Each one of us is here for a reason. Comparing yourself to others is a waste of time.

Why not focus on the things you’re good at? These strengths are unique to you. Then, if you come across something you’re not good at, you can do one of two things. You can either learn the skills to do it or just stop dwelling on it. (Gram called this fix it or forget it.) Either way, it’s more important to apply your energy to the things that matter more to you as an individual.

You must focus on becoming the best version of yourself. This is an everyday practice. Make a list of your set of core values. Another good idea is to list both your short-term and long-term goals. Then, as you achieve them, don’t forget to celebrate those accomplishments.

At the end of the day, you don’t need to prove anything to anyone except you. Show confidence in yourself. Even if you don’t feel it in the beginning. Confidence builds with each success.

Only then will you be able to let your inner light shine. I believe that’s one of the biggest lessons you can learn from a positive role model.

Strive to persevere

Your past accomplishments don’t guarantee future victories all the time. Some days will be perfect where everything goes your way. Other days, you’ll feel the anxiety and pressure that life can bring.

A positive role model can help you stay grounded during challenging times. They encourage you to keep moving along your chosen path. They help you keep your eyes on the prize as you strive to work harder to reach the goals you set.

When it comes to your pursuits in life, it’s better to be tenacious and steadfast. A good role model teaches you the importance of never giving up. They also show you the best ways to deal with any setbacks you come across in the future.

How do they do that? Simple! They have a sense of purpose and know where they want to go in life.

A great example of this is Thomas Edison. You may have heard of him; the man who’s known worldwide for his multiple inventions.

Even though his innovations have reshaped life as we know it, he wasn’t always the big success we now know him to be. His teachers said he wouldn’t amount to much. Then, as an adult, he was even fired a couple of times. The reasons? His bosses said he was a “non-productive” employee.

Not only that, but it took him 1,000 attempts to invent the light bulb. He was even asked how he felt about failing all those times. Edison answered with confidence, “I didn’t fail...The light bulb was an invention with 1,000 steps.” That’s the power of perseverance and determination.

Look for inspiration

Experts recommend you imitate your role model’s confidence, positivity, and persistence.

The important thing to remember is that a role model is someone to admire and look up to. You should aspire to have a similar outlook on life to achieve success in your own life.

The next step is to brainstorm. Go crazy with your ideas. After all, every invention ever made began as someone’s vision of a better future.

Let your imagination run wild. Use your role models’ successes and failures to come up with new and better ways to do something.

My final thought

Finding positive role models is like finding an untapped resource. These are people who you may or may not know personally. Still, you feel they’re worthy of your attention. You look up to them and feel inspired by their compassion, self-assurance, and integrity.

Tapping into their experiences can help you manage life’s ups and downs. You can channel their confidence and determination anytime you need a little pick-me-up. Then, take everything you’ve learned from them and blaze your trail in this world.

For more information about role models look below.

10 Ways To Be A Positive Role Model

Happiness Begins Within You

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Can I Make My Relationship Work?

YOU CAN’T. Not on your own. Sure, you can improve some things that are more YOU centric on your own. You can even alter your attitude and manner and learn to just accept what makes you feel less than happy. Many people do. But this is most unsatisfactory and difficult to manage for the rest of your life and I wouldn’t recommend it.

Only as a couple can make your relationship work. It must be important, and you must genuinely want it to work. Did I mention it’s hard work? Nonetheless, the rewards of a good relationship are enormous and well worth the effort you will make.

7 Keys To help your relationship work:

Have you committed?

This could be the most important thing you do. Your commitment must be to each other. To your future together. To solving any difficulties together. You should be devoted to what best serves you as a couple. At times, a decision may of necessity rest more heavily on one of you or the other. Remember to be sensitive and never overbearing when making that decision.

How do you communicate?

The way you speak to your husband tells him as much as the words you use, as does your body language. Some conversations will take you out of your comfort zone. So, speak gently to one another. You should be honest but never hurtful. Apologize frequently, especially if you are right. Don’t make statements that give the impression that you harbor a back door out of your relationship. These and other nasty statements can never be taken back and are best never said. Communication is a connection, so let it always be positive.

What are your boundaries?

Every couple needs boundaries. You are, after all, individuals, and you likely had a life before you met. Your boundaries should be defined upfront to save trouble and misunderstanding next week or next year. This doesn’t mean you have the right to know everywhere your spouse goes or all that he does. It does require that you don’t do hurtful things to each other.

Give and expect respect.

Show your spouse you respect him. Actively listen when he is speaking and sharing his opinions. You’re not obligated to see things his way, but you should be interested in his view and be aware of the value that sharing has. Your husband should similarly show his respect and regard for you. To be respectful is to be aware of your partner’s feelings.

Supporting your partner is a must.

Yes, I said must. If you want a flourishing relationship you must be your spouse’s biggest supporter. You should always encourage him and stand up for him. Your supportive husband will want what is best for you and he will never hold you back from reaching your goals and desires. You need to be a pillar your partner can lean on.

Nothing without trust.

Can you be trusted? Can he? Nothing hurts two people more than betrayal. All healthy relationships need mutual trust, and couples don’t automatically trust right away. Trust takes time and attention to develop. But with love, communication, confidence, and support your trust in one another can grow and deepen.

Flexibility for the long haul.

Things change. Life changes. As individuals, we grow at different rates and at different times. Events in life can cause one or the other partner to leap ahead while the other hunkers down for safety. This is normal but it shouldn’t become permanent. Over the passing years, you live together, flexibility is your friend. If you develop an unbending mindset you run the risk of unhappiness settling into your relationship. The continuing flexibility and growth of your relationship allow you both to find new things to be excited about singly and together.

My final thought

I believe that if you begin your relationship using the 7 keys above you have a good chance of making things work. Toss in some humor and forgiveness and at the very least you should have a happy home life while you work at it. Nothing smooths the way better than to be able to laugh at yourselves and forgive one another.

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This is the 4th and the last post in a series of responses to past most liked posts. I have placed the link below to the earlier post.

Simple Love and Care Advice for Couples