9 Best Life Lessons I Learned From Gram

Gram’s Wisdom 56

There is something exceptional about grandmothers. They seem to have a knack for making you feel special. Grandmothers always know how to make their grandchildren smile. They love to laugh and have a good time with them. Grandmothers are also the most loving people, always ready to offer a hug or a listening ear.

Grandmothers have often faced many challenges in their lives, but they have always endured. They are strong and resilient, and they never give up. Despite their strength, grandmothers are also gentle and kind. They have a wealth of experience and wisdom to share, and their words of wisdom can stay with us for a lifetime. 

My Gram’s words have been rattling around in my brain for 60 years. They are the same words I use with my grandson. They are the same words I have been sharing in these Gram’s wisdom posts. She once told me, “How we do things changes, the reasons for doing them never change.”

Here are some life lessons that anyone’s grandmother might have passed on:

Be neat and orderly.

Keeping your home clean, neat, and orderly is timeless advice. A devotion to cleanliness isn’t just about surprise guests popping in; there are many benefits to an organized household. These benefits include less stress, more motivation, and productivity.

• A cluttered and messy home can be a source of stress. A clean and organized home, on the other hand, can provide a sense of calm and order. This can help to reduce stress levels and improve your overall mood.

• When your home is clean and organized, you're more likely to feel motivated to get things done. A cluttered space can be distracting and make it difficult to focus. A clean and organized space, on the other hand, can help you to stay on task and be more productive.

Are you looking for ways to improve your mental and physical health, reduce stress, and boost your productivity? Then keeping your home clean, tidy, and organized is a great place to start. Just begin by decluttering one area at a time and make it your habit of putting things away after you use them. (Remember: trying is more important than perfection.)

Be punctual.

Show others you respect their time by arriving on time. Besides being polite, it allows you to pull yourself together and be ready for the meeting, appointment, or visit.

• When you arrive on time, you show the other person that you value their time and you are reliable. It’s also a demonstration that you are prepared and organized and you can manage your time effectively.

• You build trust with others: When you are always on time, people know they can count on you. This can be especially important in professional settings, where trust is essential.

Being punctual is a skill that takes practice, but it is worth it. Set a reminder to leave ten minutes earlier than you normally would. Arriving on time, or even a little bit early, is a simple way to make a good impression. You also set yourself up for success in both your personal and professional life.

Treat others with consideration.

Be flexible in your interactions with people. Different people might require a slightly different approach. They will appreciate the effort, and you will sharpen your people skills.

• Different people have different communication styles and needs. For example, some people prefer to be direct and to the point, while others prefer a more gentle and indirect approach. It's important to adapt your communication style to the individual you're interacting with.

• Being flexible shows you're interested in the other person. When you take time to understand how they communicate and what they need, it shows you're paying attention and that you care about what they have to say. This can build trust and rapport, which leads to more productive and enjoyable interactions.

Connect with people on a personal level and tailor your message to their needs. This can help you to build strong relationships, be more persuasive, and be successful in your career.

Love yourself.

Everyone has their struggles, but never forget to love yourself. Treat yourself like you would treat a loved one. Avoid negative self-talk and don’t attempt to be someone else. You are your person, and that person is special!

• Self-love is essential for mental and physical health. When you love yourself, you are more likely to take care of your physical and mental health. You are also more likely to make healthy choices, such as eating a healthy diet, exercising regularly, and getting enough sleep.

• Self-love is the foundation of healthy relationships. When you love yourself, you are more likely to have healthy relationships with others. You are less likely to be codependent or to attract toxic people into your life.

If happiness and success are what you seek, it is important to love yourself. Treat yourself with kindness and compassion. Skip the negative self-talk and focus on your strengths and your accomplishments.

Rough times come – but they pass.

Nothing lasts forever. Neither good times nor bad times. So, acknowledge that you will face rough times, but they will not last. Take time to lick your wounds, but eventually, you will need to pick yourself up and move forward. 

• Everyone experiences rough times at some point. It’s okay to feel sad, angry, or frustrated when you are going through a rough time. Don't try to ignore your emotions; that just makes them worse. Instead, allow yourself to feel what you are feeling, and then let it go.

If you are going through a rough time, remember you are not alone. Don't let it consume you. Just continue taking things one day at a time. Eventually, the tough times will pass, and you will be stronger.

Practice good manners. 

Using good manners doesn’t cost anything and brings harmony to your relationships. Remember to say “Please” and “Thank You” and, in general, be considerate of those around you.

1| Good manners make you more likable.

People are more likely to be drawn to and to like you if you practice good manners. This can be helpful in both your personal and professional life.

2| Good manners are a show of respect:

When you use good manners, you show respect for the other person. This can help to build positive relationships and to create a more harmonious environment.

3| Be considerate of others' feelings and needs.

This means things like holding the door open for someone. Allowing someone to go ahead of you in line. And not talking over someone when they are speaking.

4| Be mindful of your surroundings.

This means things like not talking loudly in public, not littering, and not blocking walkways.

5| Apologize when you make a mistake:

Everyone makes mistakes, but it is important to apologize when you do. This shows that you are aware of your mistake and that you are willing to make amends.

Stand by your convictions.

While you should strive to be pleasant and courteous, it is also important that you stand up for your convictions. Be assertive, not aggressive.

• If someone tries to push you around or make you feel bad about yourself, it is important to set boundaries and stand up for yourself. You can do this by calmly and respectfully explaining that you do not appreciate their behavior. You can also walk away from the situation if necessary.

Offer others the respect that you also deserve. It is important to remember that you are worthy of respect, regardless of what anyone else says. You shouldn’t let anyone make you feel like you are less worthy than they are.

Don’t fear failure. 

Lessons are found in your perceived failures. If you succeed at everything, you risk learning nothing. So go out and fail at something, learn the lesson, and become a better person. You will be more apt to reach your goals, too. 

• When you fail, you can learn from your mistakes. You can identify what went wrong and what you can do differently next time. This can help you to improve your skills and to become more successful.

• Failure can also make you more resilient. When you fail, you learn that you can overcome challenges. This can give you the confidence to try new things and to take risks.

• If you never fail, you will never learn and grow. You will never reach your full potential. So don't be afraid to fail. View it as a window for opportunity.

Failure is not something to be afraid of. It is a natural part of life, and it can be a valuable growth tool.

Cherish your family and friends.

Make family and friends a priority. A strong social circle gives you a firm foundation for success. In bad times and good, these are the people you will turn to. Make sure to foster powerful relationships, by ‘giving’ as much as you ‘take’.

• Family and friends can help you to achieve your goals. They can offer you advice, guidance, and motivation. They can also help you to stay accountable and to avoid giving up on your dreams.

• Family and friends make life more enjoyable. They are the people who you can share your joys and sorrows with. They are the people who you can laugh with and cry with. They make life more meaningful and more fun.

• Call a close relative. Have dinner with them and show them that you cherish that relationship.

If you want to be happy, healthy, and successful, make family and friends a priority. Make time for them and listen to them. Be generous to them and forgive them. And be there for them, and they will be there for you when you need them the most.

My final thoughts are.

The above bits of wisdom are simple maxims as true today as they ever were. They are meant to help us behave well and to get along with others. I have only one thing to add and that is be kind.

Thank you for taking the time to read this post.

For more information, check out these posts.

9 Pieces Of Life Advice From Your Grandma That You Should Actually Listen To.

Little Kindnesses Create Big Impacts.

Top 5 Ways To Get More Lessons From Life

Gram’s wisdom 50: Lessons from other sources.

Do you sometimes feel like you’re not getting enough out of life? I believe we all have those moments. My Gram once told me that you can never know it all because there is always more to learn and it’s difficult to do without help. Now my Gram was the lifelong learner you may have heard about. She understood one of the easier ways to learn life lessons comes from the experiences of others.

The many lessons Gram taught me over many years were not all her own experiences. She got real-life examples from her friends and from the people she met in her job as a waitress. And Gram was an avid reader. She loved books about people who tell the story of their mistakes and how they overcame them to become successful.

Gram told me we can save ourselves pain and time if we are willing to learn from others. She said we should watch how they handle difficult situations and decide whether we would like to emulate their behavior. What I learned from my Gram is that whatever the source, taking the time to learn from other’s mistakes and successes is always worthwhile.    

Use these five tips to get more lessons from life and you will find yourself happier, more accomplished, and more knowledgeable than ever before.

Be adaptable.

If you want to get more out of life there are few things more important than being adaptable, you must be able to go with the flow. The ability to adapt to change is what allows us to grow in an ever-changing world. It’s what lets us leave our comfort zone and take advantage of new opportunities and overcome challenges.

Try things you’ve never done before if you get the chance, even if it doesn’t necessarily fit into your plan for that day or that week. Goodwin.edu posits that flexible people are also more inquisitive. They aren’t afraid to ask “stupid questions” and might get some great learning experiences out of them. Being flexible doesn’t mean being a pushover. It doesn’t mean the sacrifice of your principles or the compromise of your values. It means being open to new ideas and willing to change your plans if necessary.

The most successful people are usually the most adaptable. They’re the ones who are looking for new prospects and willing to take risks. They’re the ones who are willing to change their minds when they’re proven wrong. So, for more life lessons, be adaptable, be open to new ideas, be willing to change your plans, and always look for new opportunities.

Begin a journal.

Journaling is a terrific way to find out more about what your subconscious is feeling and thinking. This activity gives you a method to track your thoughts and feelings over time. To look back and see how your attitudes and outlooks have changed. As you read about your life’s events and reactions, it can be a helpful way to work through difficult situations. Writing things down is a great way to make sure you don’t forget important lessons you learn and can also be a fun way to document happy memories. experiences you have, and people you meet throughout your life.

Beginning a journal is easy – you only need a notebook and a pen. Decide how often you want to write in your journal and set aside some time daily or weekly. The point is to just get your thoughts down on paper, so don’t worry if your journal entries aren’t perfect. Over time, you’ll find that journaling feels more natural. And, when you look back on yourjournal,l what you will find is a treasure trove of valuable life lessons.

Ask questions.

It’s important, if you want to grow and learn, that you ask questions and listen to the answers. You can learn a lot by asking people the right questions. Globalcognition.org sites that research has shown that even asking and answering your questions helps you learn, understand, and remember. They also found that conceptual questions, such as giving reasons why something happened, help you learn better than detailed questions, such as facts and figures. But often people are afraid to ask questions because they don’t want to seem uninformed. However, everyone must begin somewhere and there’s nothing wrong with being curious and asking questions.

Here are four quick tips on how to ask questions.

• Don’t be afraid to speak up.

If you’re unsure about something, it’s better to ask a question than remain silent and risk misunderstanding.

• Be specific.

Vague questions can be difficult to answer and may not give you the information you’re looking for.

• Be prepared to listen to the answer.

If you’re asking someone for advice or information, be ready to hear what they have to say. They may not tell you what you want to hear, but it’s important to be open-minded.

• Be grateful.

If someone takes the time to answer your question, be sure to thank them. A little appreciation goes a long way.

Asking questions is a great way to learn more about the world and the people around you. So don’t be afraid to speak up and ask away!

Read, read, and read more.

To get more life lessons, you should read as much as possible. There is so much information out there for those who are willing to look for it. Books can provide insights into different cultures and how to deal with certain situations. Reading takes you out of your limited view to find new perspectives on the larger world.

If you are interested in people rather than events, you can read biographies. These will show you how other people deal with life’s occurrences that you could not possibly experience for yourself and the lessons they learned from them. Even a work of fiction can teach you a lot about the world and human nature.

Seek out books and articles about topics that interest you or try some unfamiliar ones that might surprise you. It’s important to choose wisely what you read. Just like everything else in life, you should be selective and not accept everything at face value. Read with an open mind, but consider what you’re taking in. Think about whether the author is presenting a balanced view of the subject.

There are a great many books to choose from, so where do you begin? If you are unsure about what you’re interested in, or you are looking for recommendations, try asking your family or friends. Once you have a few titles, look them up in your local library or online. See if any pique your imagination and look like something you’d enjoy reading.

Reading can be a fantastic way to learn new things, or just while away the time. So, make sure to take advantage of this by picking up a book when you have some free time.

Never give up.

In life, we frequently face obstacles or challenges that seem far too large for us to handle. It’s easy to feel like throwing in the towel, but it’s important to remember that giving up is never the right answer. Give up too often, and it becomes a default habit.

So, if you feel like you’re struggling, maybe it’s time to approach things from a new perspective. You may not see immediate results but persevere, and you will ultimately reach your goals. Regardless of how difficult things appear, remember that if you persist, you can find a way to overcome your challenges.

Each failure as well as each success is a learning experience that can help you grow. Keep trying, and you’ll soon have the life you want.

 Get your FREE PDF Here. No sign-up is required.

For more information, read these posts.

10 Important Life Lessons We Are Often Taught Too Late.

How Good Are Your Adaptability Skills?

My final thoughts.

While lessons don’t necessarily sound like a good time, there are ways of learning that can be interesting, exciting, rewarding, and fun. So, begin asking questions, pick up a good book, or organize that vacation that you’ve always wanted to take. Begin making the most out of your life and learning about all it has to offer.

Thank you for reading this post. Please share it with family and friends.

Successful Days Lead To A Successful Mindset

The definition of success

The meaning of success defined by most dictionaries is the achievement of a goal. I believe a success-mindset is made through daily worthy goals accomplished.

Just achieving the tasks, you need to do instead of dawdling will encourage you to continue because you’ve stayed on track and didn’t drop the ball. Staying the course helps a successful mindset to become stronger and more flexible.

Gram’s Wisdom 32

My Gram used to say, a successful day is when you go to bed feeling like you’ve achieved something worthy during your day, and it’s enough to give you a sense of happiness and satisfaction?

She told me, to have a successful day, I should begin doing just one worthwhile thing one day. Repeating that process until it became a habit.

As I grew older, Gram revisited the idea of a successful day with me. Speaking of how success may be desired by all, but what constitutes success is different for each person.

Then, Gram reminded me that the little things are important. You don’t need massive actions or huge triumphs to accomplish something significant in your life. So, stop looking for the large wins and instead, focus on the small, steady, daily wins.

With that in mind, the tips below are small changes for you to make that can have a big impact on your success.  

5 Tips you can apply to achieve more success daily

1 | Plan your tomorrow the evening before

It’s an excellent practice to spend 10 to 15 minutes each evening (or when you’ve finished with your daily work) planning what you’ll do the next day. Have a to-do list with 3-4 important tasks that MUST be completed and at least one small thing you do simply because it makes you happy.

This list will act as a schedule for the next day. Once you have completed your morning routine, you can now begin your day productively, rather than spending time in planning mode.

2 | Do the hard stuff first

I think the hard stuff is those things you truly can't bear to do, or just don’t want to do. They may or may not be difficult, but they are often stressful for you to perform.

In his book, “Eat That Frog!”, Brian Tracy emphasizes a very useful technique to eliminate procrastination. He says that you should complete the most difficult tasks of the day FIRST!

The goal is to begin working on them as soon as you can. Try not to fret about it and just get started. Procrastination leads to uncertainty and your mind begins making up excuses and plausible reasons to avoid doing the actions you’re supposed to take.

So, start without thinking and finish whatever you dread doing. Once you’ve completed these tasks, you’ll instantly feel relieved and satisfied at having accomplished something worthy of your day.

(This might be a good time to do the fun thing. As a bribe.)

3 | Move that body daily

Exercise is crucial no matter what type of job or profession you’re in. One should never be too busy to spend at least 20 to 30 minutes a day exercising. Your body will release endorphins that make you feel happier.

Exercise helps with focus, expands your reasoning, and memory skills.

Not only that, but exercise will boost your energy levels too. You’ll feel like your life is more balanced, and subconsciously you know that you’re living a more productive life.

Very often, feeling successful is about knowing that you’re doing the right things and progressing in life. This affects your emotional and mental health levels in positive ways.

4 | Challenge yourself each day

Here are a few examples of how you can challenge yourself.

Be more mindful. Let go of any negative thoughts you have without judging them.

Step outside your comfort zone by facing some small fears. You’ll be surprised by the amount of headway you can make toward dispelling them if you apply yourself.

Build your confidence by going after and learning the skills necessary for something new you have always wanted or something you have just put off.

Stop complaining about everything. No one owes you, no one cares, and no one wants to hear it. Instead, try being kinder and more compassionate to yourself and others.

Read more books. Read a book by an unfamiliar author about an unaccustomed subject. Push yourself to read beyond your present understanding, and you will grow.

Success is a habit… and this is how you train yourself to seek success daily. Inch by inch, you’ll get better.

5 | You are accountable for your success

Accountability is something you do for yourself, not something others do for you.

Do you truly understand what you value? YOU get to design what is a worthy successful day. Have you ensured that what you choose is aligned with the results you want?

Did you accomplish what you proposed to do? Were you sidetracked and did you waste time along the way? Did you check off the tasks on your to-do list?

Do you creatively deal with your obstacles, and learn from your failures as well as your successes? Are you measuring your results immediately, or at a length of time to see your progress?

You must hold yourself accountable every single day. No one can do this for you. You are ultimately responsible for your success or failure. So, evaluate your performance, honestly.

Initially, adopting these 5 techniques might be challenging because they’re new to you. But as the days go by, you’ll realize that they are extremely helpful and aid your progress while reducing anxiety and freeing up more time for you to do what you love.

My final thought

Since success has different meanings for each of us, your success will likely look different than mine. Your day will also be distinctly unique. Yet, we all measure success in the same way, by goals achieved, regardless of the kinds of goals set. Here’s to your future success.

For more information related to this post check out the links below.

5 Ways To Have A Success Mindset

Appreciate The Little Things

I hope you enjoyed this post. Please share it with those you love.

How Do You Adapt To Difficulties?

Adapt yourself

I know a bit about adapting to a situation you weren’t expecting. My husband left our daughter and me in a restaurant 10 days before Christmas. The note he left us at home said he just couldn’t take the responsibility any longer.

I thought, how could he? Her birthday is in 11 days. But I had a steady job and my daughter liked her school. Soon we found a smaller more affordable house within walking distance to school. With that decision made, our first adaptation was put in motion.

We had no family where we lived, but they were only a phone call away. Our friends were the backbone of our support system and the encouragement we received from them was priceless. A good support system of people you love, who love you back, can be essential when you’re adapting to a new way of living.

Adapt or adjust, flexibility is key.

Adapt, if you are facing a situation that will be long-term. Whether it’s beyond your control or arises unexpectedly is less important than duration. For example, you need to adapt if your new job is a 2-hour commute both ways. Adjust, if the situations will be short-term. For instance, shop at a different grocery store for a week while the city repairs the water pipe. One of these two options provides the solution to most problems, so, of course, you want to be flexible in your choice.

Problems, change, stress-they're part of everyone's life, no one is exempt. Adaptability means accepting these things as normal. People who are successful in life, are flexible and develop a mental toughness that allows them to see setbacks and failures as ways to grow and improve. They expect hurdles so, even before the challenges occur, they intend to face them and find solutions.

Are you adaptable or stuck?

Adaptability is a choice. It's you, making up your mind to be flexible, responsive, analytical, and solution-oriented. Choosing to adapt, instead of fighting the issue means that you give yourself the freedom to take action to find a solution. Choosing to be adaptive means you’re the victor and not the victim.

Here are some techniques to help you increase your adaptive skills:

1 | Do you have a sense of humor?

It can be a great ally for you. (Mine certainly was.) One thing humor helps you do is to get some perspective on yourself and your situation. Humor can help you see the fun in the situation when you make a mistake. It can make it easier for you to learn from your mistake.

2 | Do you control your negative emotions?

Negative emotions can get you into a lot of trouble. When you're in a stressful situation, distance yourself until you have your emotions under control. When you're calmer, deal with the situation.

3 | Do you see change as part of life?

Evaluate the way you react to unexpected events. Are you open to trying new ideas or methods? Change can be uncomfortable, but it needn’t be your enemy. Make a conscious effort to make changes in stride. This is a valuable skill to learn, and it will help you in many ways.

4 | Are you good at saying “No”?

If you're stressed because you've over-committed yourself, it's tougher to adapt to situations as they arise. Make your schedule work for you, not against you. Learn to say “No,” calmly and firmly, when necessary.

5 | Simplify your life.

Get rid of clutter and attachments that wear you out and get in the way. Decide what's essential to you and what you want to do with your time and concentrate on that.

6 | Be present in your life.

Focus on what you can control. Let go of the past and the future. They will drain you of the enjoyment to be found in the now.

My final thought

Change happens. It’s rarely fun. Normally it leaves us feeling powerless. If we allow it to. But how often, after a change has occurred, and we have accommodated it, do we wonder why we made such a fuss? I believe that the times I have taken the initiative in a new situation, I adapted to it more easily. How easily do you adapt?

Thank you for reading this post. I hope you will share it with your family and friends.

Can I Make My Relationship Work?

YOU CAN’T. Not on your own. Sure, you can improve some things that are more YOU centric on your own. You can even alter your attitude and manner and learn to just accept what makes you feel less than happy. Many people do. But this is most unsatisfactory and difficult to manage for the rest of your life and I wouldn’t recommend it.

Only as a couple can make your relationship work. It must be important, and you must genuinely want it to work. Did I mention it’s hard work? Nonetheless, the rewards of a good relationship are enormous and well worth the effort you will make.

7 Keys To help your relationship work:

Have you committed?

This could be the most important thing you do. Your commitment must be to each other. To your future together. To solving any difficulties together. You should be devoted to what best serves you as a couple. At times, a decision may of necessity rest more heavily on one of you or the other. Remember to be sensitive and never overbearing when making that decision.

How do you communicate?

The way you speak to your husband tells him as much as the words you use, as does your body language. Some conversations will take you out of your comfort zone. So, speak gently to one another. You should be honest but never hurtful. Apologize frequently, especially if you are right. Don’t make statements that give the impression that you harbor a back door out of your relationship. These and other nasty statements can never be taken back and are best never said. Communication is a connection, so let it always be positive.

What are your boundaries?

Every couple needs boundaries. You are, after all, individuals, and you likely had a life before you met. Your boundaries should be defined upfront to save trouble and misunderstanding next week or next year. This doesn’t mean you have the right to know everywhere your spouse goes or all that he does. It does require that you don’t do hurtful things to each other.

Give and expect respect.

Show your spouse you respect him. Actively listen when he is speaking and sharing his opinions. You’re not obligated to see things his way, but you should be interested in his view and be aware of the value that sharing has. Your husband should similarly show his respect and regard for you. To be respectful is to be aware of your partner’s feelings.

Supporting your partner is a must.

Yes, I said must. If you want a flourishing relationship you must be your spouse’s biggest supporter. You should always encourage him and stand up for him. Your supportive husband will want what is best for you and he will never hold you back from reaching your goals and desires. You need to be a pillar your partner can lean on.

Nothing without trust.

Can you be trusted? Can he? Nothing hurts two people more than betrayal. All healthy relationships need mutual trust, and couples don’t automatically trust right away. Trust takes time and attention to develop. But with love, communication, confidence, and support your trust in one another can grow and deepen.

Flexibility for the long haul.

Things change. Life changes. As individuals, we grow at different rates and at different times. Events in life can cause one or the other partner to leap ahead while the other hunkers down for safety. This is normal but it shouldn’t become permanent. Over the passing years, you live together, flexibility is your friend. If you develop an unbending mindset you run the risk of unhappiness settling into your relationship. The continuing flexibility and growth of your relationship allow you both to find new things to be excited about singly and together.

My final thought

I believe that if you begin your relationship using the 7 keys above you have a good chance of making things work. Toss in some humor and forgiveness and at the very least you should have a happy home life while you work at it. Nothing smooths the way better than to be able to laugh at yourselves and forgive one another.

If you liked this post, please share it with your family and friends.

This is the 4th and the last post in a series of responses to past most liked posts. I have placed the link below to the earlier post.

Simple Love and Care Advice for Couples