Live Your Life Outside The Box

Do you live in a box? Many people are living in a box, not of their own making. The box is a set of guidelines for us to live by, and it has rules meant to keep us safe from the “bad” things in life. So, who made the rules and why does the box feel so confining?

Let me begin by tackling the rules. No one person ever makes up “the rules” and they are always evolving. As to the box well, some people are comfortable in the box they were given. Some people, myself included, prefer a roomier box of their own making. While other people just can’t breathe in a box.

What does life outside the box mean?

Ask a hundred people, and you’ll likely get many different answers to the meaning of life outside the box. The phrase "outside the box" can refer to thinking outside conventional wisdom or challenging the status quo of society's mold. Some people believe it means rejecting materialism and embracing a more minimalist lifestyle.

Some use the phrase "outside the box" to illustrate the radical change they intend to make in their lifestyle. They may see this as leaving their comfort zone, taking risks, and doing something different, even if it’s scary.

Challenge the status quo.

A recent article stated that you need to experience three things to feel fulfilled.

1. You must be doing something which challenges you.

2. You must feel interested in the things you do.

3. There needs to be some reward for doing these things.

The problem is most people don't experience all three of these at the same time. When you get stuck in the status quo, you frequently feel you are no longer being challenged. Things aren’t all that interesting, they're not exciting, and they certainly don’t capture your imagination. Even if there is a reward in the form of a paycheck or a stable relationship, losing the other two items does not make up for this.

It's time to challenge the status quo. How? Follow these five steps.

Stop doing what everyone else does.

Sure, everyone else might be happy doing a certain thing, but this doesn't mean that you are. People have all kinds of jobs. They're involved in all types of activities. Not all of these will feel right for you. By focusing less on what everyone else is doing and more on what you want to do, you will feel much happier.

Quit hiding your light.

Be more visible. Be more vocal. Seriously, are you happy playing it safe? Wouldn’t you rather take a chance on being seen for who you are, in all your splendid, eccentric glory? The lovely thing about letting go of the idea of fitting in is you are no longer pigeonholed as a follower. It's a lot more fun being the innovator anyway.

Cease believing happiness can be purchased.

When you're unhappy, you begin buying yourself stuff, believing this will somehow make up for it. The harsh truth? All the new clothes, fancy cars, and exotic vacations in the world are never going to make you feel any more fulfilled. Spending each day of your career doing what you hate to get ahead is always going to be a soul-suck.

Stop doubting yourself.

You don't need everyone else to tell you what the right thing to do is or how to do it. You already have strong instincts. Do what feels honest to you. Honor your moral code. Behave with integrity, and you'll find you're a lot happier for it.

Don’t ignore your chances.

Playing it safe can be one of the most important ways we lock ourselves into the status quo. Unfortunately, this is one of the ways used to keep from bettering yourself. If you want your life to change, you must stifle the urge to play it safe and grab hold of the chance you get to do something different.

Together these five items become a mighty force for change. Dedicate yourself to living life outside the box. Explore your dreams and embrace the person you are inside. Find challenge and passion, and you'll have a fulfilling life.

Live a meaningful life outside societal expectations.

 For years, the word 'countercultural' seemed to be a dirty word. Now it's become the buzzword of today's youth. No one wants to conform. Why should they? While there's much to be said for living as an individual, the path is neither smooth nor easy.

But if you’re wondering how, then keep reading.

Acknowledge there's more to life.

If you're dissatisfied, you've probably already reached this conclusion. Having a healthy bank account is an awesome goal. So is searching for the perfect relationship. But there's much more you can get from life than this. You want to make a difference in people’s lives. You want to realize your dreams. You want to help make the world a better place. In this step, you must realize that life can most definitely be more fulfilling if you live your way.

Block out negativity.

From childhood on, you are pressured to conform. The message is everywhere in the media. You’re encouraged to grow up, go to college, get a good job, buy a house, have a family, and do all the other things as if they're on a checklist waiting to be checked off. You don't need this. Take a different approach to social media. Turn off unnecessary notifications. Tune out, well-meaning friends. Don’t allow yourself to be forced into someone else’s box.

What do you want?

Listen to your inner voice. In the silence you have created, take time for meditation or to discover mindfulness in other ways. Ask yourself these questions:  What do you want to accomplish in your life? What is your passion? How can you make a difference? Spend as much time as needed until you have your answers. Don’t rush them, remember this is your life.

Act on your thoughts. 

None of this will ever do you any good unless you act. Consider the answers you received in the silence. What is the logical progression of tasks needed to turn these into reachable goals? Write them down. Put them in your planner, or on a calendar. Set yourself on the journey and throw yourself into it with your whole heart. Dream, discover, explore. Afraid you might trip and fall? Of course, you will. It is a normal part of life. When this happens, look for the lesson to be learned and move on. Do not let anything or anyone stop you. You are the architect of your life.

My final thoughts.

Living life on your terms is a wonderful feeling. It won’t always be simple or easy, but the benefits outweigh the difficulties. Be patient with yourself. Living outside the box can be a great way to discover what you’re capable of.

For additional information, read this post. 

Living Outside Of The Box And How To Know If You Are!

Thank you for reading this post. Share it with your friends.

Developing A Success Mindset

Are there dreams and ambitions that you haven’t reached? Are you frustrated and overwhelmed? If so, relax, you’re not alone. Sometimes, it seems like there are a select few people who attain great heights – and then there’s the rest of us.

What differentiates the people who realize their aspirations from those who always appear to struggle? The difference is that successful people have taken control of their thoughts, beliefs, and their vision of the world.

They have mastered the important mindsets necessary for the achievement of success.

No one is born with this success-oriented attitude. You can acquire it by unpacking the way you think now and ridding yourself of old unworkable attitudes. Shift your mindset by mastering new skills and practices, and adopting a new stance.

What Is a “Mindset”, and does it help?

A mindset is an assemblage of related beliefs that shape how you see the world and function in it. For example, if you have a positive mindset, you are optimistic and focus on the good things, rather than dwelling on the negative.

Mindset is important because it influences how you behave. Your behaviors are based on what you think and believe. Everyone works from an acknowledged mindset, even if you’re not aware of it. Mastering these methods of thought is a matter of choice.

An important thing to remember about mindsets is that they’re learned. You’re not born thinking a particular way; you pick it up from others and your experiences in the world.

Hey, this is great news. It means that anyone can intentionally transform their mindset.

A shift in your mindset carries benefits.

The right mindset can have a major impact on your personal and professional life. Advantages are:

• Greater overall happiness and well-being. By seeing the world in a positive light, you’ll be healthier and more satisfied.

• Higher self-esteem. You’ll have more confidence. You’ll view the things you presently can’t do as skills you have yet to master.

• A healthy attitude towards failure and setbacks. You’ll recover from bumps in the road and use each challenge as a valuable learning experience.

• A successful career or a business owner. You’ll be able to identify opportunities and act on them.

• Improvements in your relationships. With your focus on growth and development, you’ll be an inspiration to others and like-minded people will be attracted to you.

• Stress reduction. You’ll be better able to handle stress and won’t feel overcome even when you’re busy or under pressure.

• Increased creativity. You’ll combine creativity and innovative thinking in all areas of your life.

5 Key mindsets for success.

These are the mindsets that encourage success:

1. Growth Mindset. This mindset is the foundation of all change. Without it, you’ll have trouble adopting other positive mindsets. If you have a growth mindset, you tend to believe that your talents, intelligence, and skills can be developed through a combination of hard work, effective training, and guidance from others.

2. Abundance Mindset. The abundance mindset says that there’s plenty to go around for everybody. When we operate from a perspective of abundance, we make better decisions and radiate generosity.

3. Creativity Mindset. The creativity mindset says that anyone can be creative, not only artists. It uses various tools to unlock imagination and innovation and apply it to a variety of issues.

4. Problem-Solving Mindset. This mindset says no problem is too much to conquer. It uses brainstorming and other techniques to identify and solve problems.

5. Entrepreneurial Mindset. CEOs and business owners with this mindset seek out opportunities and act on them. They innovate in the face of challenges and don’t let risk dissuade them from pursuing a new idea.

If you pursue skills and techniques to adopt and cultivate these 5 mindsets, you’ll experience benefits in every area of your personal and professional life. It takes time to begin seeing results, but there are actions you can do each day to get one step closer.

Observe your thinking.                              

A good place to start is to evaluate your current mindset. This is the way of thinking that’s been unconsciously shaped through your experiences and the influence of others over time.

Ask yourself these things:

• How positive are you?

• How do you see topics, difficulties, and challenges?

• Do you celebrate the successes of others or feel envious?

• Are you very bothered by how others see you?

• Are you fixated on what you don’t have rather than what you do?

• Do you see the world’s resources as limited and scarce, or abundant?

• Are you an imaginative thinker?

• Where do you use creativity in your daily life?

These questions will help you understand where you’re starting point is. Providing you with ideas for improvement that you can begin working on right away.

Allow yourself grace when you make a mistake.

A part of what most people need to work on is how to view their blunders and failures. And yes, mistakes will be made. The question is, do you beat yourself up when something goes wrong?

One thing that sets success-minded people apart from the rest is how they view obstacles. To them, every failure is a valuable learning experience. Begin by asking yourself, “what can I learn from this”?

When you make a mistake, extend the same kindness to yourself that you would offer to someone else. Try to fix it and then let it go. Look for the lesson. Note what went wrong and what you could have done to improve your chance of success.

Practice gratitude.

What do you focus on – the things you have or the things you want? People who practice gratitude are much happier and more successful than those who only see what they are lacking.

You can begin practicing gratitude immediately by brainstorming a list of things you’re grateful for. There’s no item either small or seemingly inconsequential to go on this list. Think about your family, friends, job, health, and hobbies.

A daily practice of giving thanks is even more effective. Buy a notebook and make it your gratitude journal. Each day, jot down a few things you’re grateful for. This reminds you of the abundance that’s present in your life. 

Discover what inspires you.

Inspiration helps when you’re trying to come up with ideas or solve problems. You may incorrectly believe that it comes as a flash out of the sky, but this is not how creativity works.

People who are in touch with their creativity make it a daily practice and can tap into it when they need it.

There are many sources of inspiration that you can use, including:

• A walk in the park

• Yoga or meditation

• Music

• Quotes

• Painting, playing music, or some other creative activity

• Blogs or books

• Good conversation

• Good memories

• Your gratitude lists

• Friends or family members

It can be anything that makes you feel inspired. Choose something that excites you that you can turn to whenever you need a boost.

Try something new.

All 5 of the success mindsets are concerned with growth and a love of learning. A great way to transform your mindset is to discover something new to learn. It doesn’t have to be something related to your career or something practical. And you don’t need to excel at it. The process of learning itself will help you transform.

Pick up a musical instrument or a new language. Take up a new sport or explore a topic like cosmology or philosophy. Learn about the history of your hometown.

Remember, the whole point is to get you learning and expanding your perspective. It shouldn’t be stressful. Choose something fun that captivates your imagination.

Study successful people.

It’s much easier to transform your mindset when you have an example. Therefore, it’s a good idea to learn from people who’ve mastered this process.

One way to do this is to read biographies and autobiographies of successful people. Choose business leaders, athletes, movers, and shakers and read about how they did it. If you’re not a big reader, you can listen to interviews and watch videos. Try to get insight into how they think and how they conduct themselves.

Even better, seek out people you consider successful and spend time with them. Pick their brain and feel their positive influence transform your mindset – and your life.

My final thoughts.

Everyone wants to be successful, if not always in the same way. So, you can take these ideas and mold them into something that reflects what success looks and feels like to you.

Thank you for taking the time to read this post.

Want to learn more about how to get a successful mindset? Head over here.

What’s Most Important To Your Success - Mindset Or Strategy

9 Best Mindsets For Success

Your Mindset On Time And Small Changes

Gram’s Wisdom 40: Small changes make a big difference.

How many of you had parents or other adults ask you, at 7 or 8 years old, what you wanted to be or do when you were grown, then laugh at your answer? I never understood what was funny. Some children just seem to know forever that they want to be a doctor, while others have no idea whatsoever and change their minds daily. The decision about what you want to do with your life is one of the most difficult things you'll go through. Fortunately, at this young age, you have plenty of time to sort this out. You’ve seen the cumulative effect time has on what you learn and the habits you make.

Gram often told me that being an adult doesn't come with a manual, that much of it can be trial and error, and you will make many mistakes along the way. One way to minimize risks is to make small changes as you grow over an extended amount of time, rather than trying to transform your life overnight. By observing, over time, the effect of your actions, you know how well, or not a particular decision is working for you. 

As a human being, you have the power to choose. Whatever you do, it's your choice. Do nothing and that is your choice as well. But how can you tell which choice is right and which is wrong? After all, the possibilities are endless. Don’t rush the decision. Try using these steps to choose your most significant small change for a better life.

Determine your meaningful objectives.

Whatever you want to accomplish, make sure it's meaningful to you. Stop looking at the objectives that others set for themselves. Their goals are not your goals. Why? Because they are not you. Setting an inappropriate objective for the wrong reason will not give you the result you hoped for.

Do you want to be a doctor with your own practice or own a florist shop? Do it because you want to, not because your parents are pressuring you or your friends believe it is the right thing to do.

Consider what would make you happy and add joy to your life. Go beyond the superficial and dive deep into what brings those feelings to you right now. Don't try to change things just for the sake of doing something new, unless new is the thing you desire. If you do that, you'll find it’s not sustainable, and soon you will lose your enthusiasm for it.

Simplify your goals.

Most people have some huge goals, such as owning a dream home, traveling around the world, or making a fortune. While there’s nothing wrong with dreaming big, these things take time and hard work.

Let's say you want to have a home by the sea. Break this goal into small, simple steps. Evaluate your income and expenses, determine how much your dream home would cost, and what’s involved in the process. Also, try to determine what small changes you'll have to make to accomplish your goal. Allow yourself ample time to reach your goal. Time compounds your effort.

Tackle one challenge at a time. Don’t try and do all the things at once.

For instance, you could begin by taking a second job or starting a side hustle. Put some money aside every month. As your side business grows, turn it into a full-time venture. Later, you'll be able to get credit and buy that dream home.

Constancy is key.

Believe it or not, you can bring your ideas to life without changing everything at once. It’s that important first step that can move you in the right direction. Small things, such as building a new habit over time, can go a long way toward your success.

Whatever tiny changes you make, turn them into habits. It's not enough to put money aside for a month or two. A house costs a lot more than that. Instead, save money every month for one year, three years, or five years. Commit to those years and celebrate the milestones as you achieve them.

If you feel like giving up, remember why you started in the first place. Focus on your end goal and remind yourself that everything you do brings you another step closer to the destination. Don't give up - your hard work will pay off. It's just a matter of time.

Small actions lead to big changes.

Taking the first step is always the hardest. It’s not uncommon to see people never do what they have in mind just because they’re too afraid to begin. New experiences come with a dose of fear. Not everyone is willing to let go of their fear and take on a new challenge. Be assured, though, that if you want to succeed, you must embrace the unknown and take risks.

No matter what you're trying to achieve, taking the first step can be terrifying. You might think:

    • What if I fail?

    • How will I make money?

    • What will people think?

    • What if I’m no good?

    • What if it's not the right time to do it?

    • Am I ready for this?

The truth is there is no guarantee that you'll succeed. But you'll never know how well it's going to turn out unless you try. Do you want to spend the rest of your life wondering "what if?”

That first step is always the hardest because it requires you to embrace the unknown and face your fears. It's also the most important step - without it, nothing will change.

My final thoughts.

Take a baby step to change your life. Most times, it's the smallest things that have the greatest impact on our lives. Small things take time to accumulate and build. It takes perseverance and dedication. You needn’t have everything figured out from day one. What you need is a goal and the courage to do one little, minuscule thing to get started.

Later, take another step and then another, and so on. Stop waiting for the perfect moment to get started. Stop overanalyzing and just go for it! The best time to begin is now.

For more information on how to establish a new change, read this post.

Small Changes Over Time Equal Big Results

Please share this post if you enjoyed it.

Create Your Intentional Life

Live with intention or by default

There’s much talk about intentional living lately. But what does this mean? Intentional living is consciously living in alignment with your values and beliefs.

It’s opposite to what many people do. They live in default mode, being satisfied to only take action when disasters occur.

Intentional living is about an awareness of who you want to be and how you want to live. Of making that choice and then being disciplined enough to do it consistently.

How to live your life intentionally

Take the time, take control of your life, and make decisions that matter. Not to your Mom or your best friend. Matter to you.  Choose the course for your life or life will make those choices for you. And those choices will likely be haphazard and unpleasant. In other words, take control while you still have time to create an exciting life or one of peace and calm if that is your preference.

Try these 10 tips to help you live with intention:

1 | Your choices matter. An intentional life is all about making choices that make sense for you and your beliefs. Determine the kind of life you want to lead and direction you want to take that will create the results you want. Change as necessary life isn’t static.

But choose. Your past needn’t be an issue. You may have been afraid to make a choice and fail. It’s true, you can’t fail if you never try. You don’t want to make an incorrect choice. However, this thinking is a trap. You should make a reasonable choice and give it your best effort. Without it, you may not experience the success and happiness that you deserve.

Your greatest power is the power of decision.

“It’s not hard to make decisions when you know what your values are.”

— Roy Disney

2 | Visualize your dream life in detail. Have a target in mind. Think about how you’d like to live. Be bold-spirited and leave your doubts and limitations behind for a moment. Go for broke it’s your life.

Consider your ideal day. How would you like to spend your time? Who else would be there? Where would you live? What would your finances be like? Does it include travel or education? Give it some thought. Write it down in a journal or a piece of paper. Refer back to it often.

3 | Know your values and beliefs. A large part of intentional living is living aligned with your values and your beliefs. It’s not about reacting to everything in the most expedient fashion. It’s about proactively living on your terms. It’s necessary to be intimately familiar with your beliefs and values to accomplish that.

4 |Prioritize the first things first. Money isn’t the main thing, but it’s an important thing. Money is great for solving many of life’s challenges such as food and housing. It’s also a necessary resource that affords you the ability to do the things you want to do like traveling. If you’re having financial struggles, it makes the most sense to work on your finances first.

Make a logical progression for each part of your life you’d like to change. Your health is key to your enjoyment of life. If you need to lose 100 pounds, going for a daily walk and eliminating high-calorie drinks would be a good beginning. After a month of walking, you could add additional exercise and diet changes.

Focus on financial and health issues first. After you’ve gained some momentum, you can address the other parts of your life.

5 | Set goals for the major areas of your life. These typically include your home, career, relationships, and education. Of course, you can add other categories as you need them, depending on your aspirations and values.

6 | Choose or create habits to support those goals. Intentional living is much easier with supportive habits in place. You’ll run out of willpower otherwise. Select simple, but effective habits that will help you to reach your goals and begin implementing them.

7 | Decide how you will spend your time. Most of us don’t give a lot of thought to what we do each day. Keeping your dreams and values in mind, what is the best thing for you to do at this moment? What do you need to accomplish today? Have you made a plan? Make choices and avoid operating on autopilot.

8 | Master your impulses. Most of our impulses lead us down the wrong path. They’re often habitual and related to pleasure or discomfort avoidance. Intentional living is about making rational decisions and exercising consistent follow through regardless of comfort. Following your impulses are the opposite of intentional living.

9 | Reject distractions. This includes all distracting thoughts of the past or future. Intention requires presence. Distractions are things you shouldn’t be doing at that moment. Even paying your bills can be a distraction if you should be doing something more important at that time.

10 | Take stock of your day. How well did you do today at living intentionally? What challenges did you face? Where did you fall short? What can you do tomorrow even better than you did it today? What win did you have that you can build on? Learn something new each day for the future.

 My final thought

Are you choosing and creating your life or just living by default? Having a life, that you love will never happen by accident. Be courageous enough to choose the life you want for yourself. Decide the kind of person you want to be. Make your decisions and choose your actions accordingly. Remember, when you refuse to make a choice, you have made your choice.

Be present in your life. Be in control of your life. Be happy in your life.

I would appreciate it if you please share this post with your family and friends.

Reflect, Change, And Grow

Grow beyond your comfort zone

With a New Year just around the corner, many of you are forming plans for what you hope to achieve, and who you hope to become in the future. It’s important that before you finalize those plans, you have spent some time in reflection on this year’s accomplishments.

You will want to ask yourself these questions first. How have you have grown this year as a person and what did you contribute to the world? And lastly, did you bring your previous year’s plans to fruition or are you still the same person who had big dreams last December?

If you succeeded in your aims this year, then I am positive you know the amount of effort it will take to repeat it. If not, it’s time for you to move from your comfort zone because it’s not serving you. Make some scary changes, or just one, if more seems too overwhelming.

Here are some reasons to change:

1.     Growth takes change

Change is necessary for growth, in fact, growth is impossible without change! You can choose to stay safely in your familiar comfort zone, but if you do, you’ll be missing out on all life has to offer.

The challenge of a new job or moving to a different city might be uncomfortable, especially at first. But it’s guaranteed that change is likely to lead you down all sorts of unexpected paths, with rewards you could never have imagined, just waiting for you. Wouldn’t you rather be a butterfly than remain a caterpillar?

“Without reflection, we go blindly on our way, creating more unintended consequences, and failing to achieve anything useful.”

— Margaret J. Wheatley

2.     Flexibility aids resilience

Change forces you to become more flexible. Faced with large unexpected changes, you learn to adapt and move with the flow. And once you’ve learned to roll with whatever the circumstances are, you begin to see the positives and rise to the challenges. Even something as negative as losing your job can open you up to new prospects and exciting opportunities, such as changing industries, furthering your education, or starting your own business.

3.     Focusing on your values creates change

There’s nothing quite like change either good or bad to make you focus on what’s genuinely important in your life. Negative changes like illness, divorce, or business reverses can help you recognize the importance of relationships, with family, and friends. Having to make tough decisions can sharpen your focus on what your ethical framework is, what you will and won’t stand for in your life.

4.     Small steps can accomplish big things

Not all changes are big or life-changing. Small incremental steps, made over time to your habits and routines, can add up to huge changes in the future. You might start getting off the bus one stop early and after a few months find yourself walking to the office every day.

Making small changes often has a snowball effect and before you know it you have accomplished that big, seemingly impossible task.

5.     Confident as you meet life’s challenges

You might be surprised to discover how strong you are. Your confidence will increase as you deal with life’s challenges and you’ll quickly learn what you can handle and what you can’t.

And as a bonus, change can make you a more compassionate and kinder person and give you more insight into other people’s circumstances and choices.

Learn to see change as an opportunity, not a threat, and you will live a much more fulfilled and exciting life.

I hope you find this post valuable and share it with your family and friends.

For further reading check out this post from a year ago.

Using Self-Reflection To Your Advantage