Wellness And Its Connection To A Positive Mindset

Gram’s Wisdom 44: Positivity and wellness.

When you feel well it’s a positive feeling. Positive thinking can make you feel better at the moment, but can it make you feel better overall?

My Gram certainly thought so. Gram understood the direct connections between exercise and a balanced diet on your physical wellness, she didn’t see positivity as a substitute for taking care of yourself. But she felt there was a definite link between positivity and your physical and mental wellness.

She often reminded me as I grew up, that my well-being was in my control. To feel well, tell yourself that you do. To be well, do the positive things that contribute to health and wellness.

Don’t beat yourself up.

Usually, stress is thought of as coming from external factors like work, traffic, or family friction, beyond your control. But a surprising amount of stress in life comes from within.

When a difficult situation arises, or even if you anticipate a difficult situation, some of you tend to criticize yourselves and begin imagining the things that could go wrong.

While it is important to understand the possible downsides of a situation, if you spend too much time thinking about the dangers of a situation or how we may be unprepared to deal with them, it can drastically increase the levels of unhealthy stress that can come from a situation. This stress not only makes it harder for you to think straight and control the situation, but too much stress over a long period contributes to health problems including weight gain and heart disease.

The next time that you begin to worry about a situation, look at it from a viewpoint of finding ways to make the situation favorable rather than thinking about how the situation could get worse. This small example of positive thinking will lower your stress levels, making you feel more comfortable and helping you to maintain control over the situation.

Positivity and other coping mechanisms.

Stressing about negative situations does more than prevent you from solving the problem at hand, it can also make problems worse and even create further difficulties.

If you are stressed or otherwise upset about something, it can be easy to slip into making unhealthy choices, whether that’s turning to comfort food or drugs. Even legal ones like tobacco and alcohol can quickly harm your health.

Thinking optimistically protects your health from the main effects of stress as well as these additional problems that can come on when you are drawn to manage your stress in unhealthy ways.

A positive mindset bolsters your health.

It was already discussed above that excessive anxiety over too long a period can be bad for the heart. This can be partially due to those secondary concerns mentioned in that last paragraph, like a diet. However, it can also be due to stress itself.

Stress is a complicated phenomenon in the body, involving a lot of chemicals being created and released into your blood. This cascade of events evolved in humans to help us run from predators or fight invaders, but a faster pulse and slowed digestion don’t help us get over the loss of a loved one or the frenzy of tax time. Our ancient ancestors needed the stress response to escape danger, but in today’s modern world it can tend to linger too long. This can be a draw on your body’s resources and can even prevent it from fighting an infection like it is supposed to.

Thinking positively can be good for your emotional health, but it may also help you to avoid whatever bug is going around.

Pondering positivity.

Your attitude is everything.

How you face life each day largely determines how you feel about your day. If you have a positive approach to life and yourself, even your most demanding days will feel tolerable. Thinking positively is a simple rule, the key to living a satisfying, fulfilled life. However, putting it into practice in your daily life can be more difficult.

Consistently thinking positive can be challenging. Maybe your self-confidence isn't as strong as it could be. If this is the case, you may need to take a leap of faith to think positively.

To be positive you must persevere.

Negativity is the human default, and everyone falls prey to it at some time or another. You are human, and you will stumble and even fall occasionally. The positive person is not faint-hearted, he knows that to stay down is a failure, not a fall. After a short letdown, you’ll remind yourself that with your intelligence and perseverance, something good will happen soon. You can’t lose by approaching life’s events with positive thinking.

We get what we expect.

Dare to think your project offering will be chosen. Whatever we expect or believe will occur will indeed come to pass. So, if you believe that you'll do well on a work project, you will. If you expect not to do well, then you likely won't. The implication is that if you can manage your thoughts, you can think your way to success.

When you aren’t sure about how to think about a situation, approach life positively. With enough positivity, you can change your life.

My final thought.

Looking on the bright side can be challenging, but if you don’t take it seriously it’s impossible. While some people avoid trying very hard to be positive because they think that it’s just a bunch of feel-good nonsense, hopefully, this article has helped you to understand some physical and mental benefits of positive thinking.

Thank you for taking the time to read this post. Let me know if I’m on track with the kind of information you are looking for.

For more information, check out these posts.

The Power Of Positivity.

Does Your Role Model Have A Positive Mindset?

Your Mindset On Time And Small Changes

Gram’s Wisdom 40: Small changes make a big difference.

How many of you had parents or other adults ask you, at 7 or 8 years old, what you wanted to be or do when you were grown, then laugh at your answer? I never understood what was funny. Some children just seem to know forever that they want to be a doctor, while others have no idea whatsoever and change their minds daily. The decision about what you want to do with your life is one of the most difficult things you'll go through. Fortunately, at this young age, you have plenty of time to sort this out. You’ve seen the cumulative effect time has on what you learn and the habits you make.

Gram often told me that being an adult doesn't come with a manual, that much of it can be trial and error, and you will make many mistakes along the way. One way to minimize risks is to make small changes as you grow over an extended amount of time, rather than trying to transform your life overnight. By observing, over time, the effect of your actions, you know how well, or not a particular decision is working for you. 

As a human being, you have the power to choose. Whatever you do, it's your choice. Do nothing and that is your choice as well. But how can you tell which choice is right and which is wrong? After all, the possibilities are endless. Don’t rush the decision. Try using these steps to choose your most significant small change for a better life.

Determine your meaningful objectives.

Whatever you want to accomplish, make sure it's meaningful to you. Stop looking at the objectives that others set for themselves. Their goals are not your goals. Why? Because they are not you. Setting an inappropriate objective for the wrong reason will not give you the result you hoped for.

Do you want to be a doctor with your own practice or own a florist shop? Do it because you want to, not because your parents are pressuring you or your friends believe it is the right thing to do.

Consider what would make you happy and add joy to your life. Go beyond the superficial and dive deep into what brings those feelings to you right now. Don't try to change things just for the sake of doing something new, unless new is the thing you desire. If you do that, you'll find it’s not sustainable, and soon you will lose your enthusiasm for it.

Simplify your goals.

Most people have some huge goals, such as owning a dream home, traveling around the world, or making a fortune. While there’s nothing wrong with dreaming big, these things take time and hard work.

Let's say you want to have a home by the sea. Break this goal into small, simple steps. Evaluate your income and expenses, determine how much your dream home would cost, and what’s involved in the process. Also, try to determine what small changes you'll have to make to accomplish your goal. Allow yourself ample time to reach your goal. Time compounds your effort.

Tackle one challenge at a time. Don’t try and do all the things at once.

For instance, you could begin by taking a second job or starting a side hustle. Put some money aside every month. As your side business grows, turn it into a full-time venture. Later, you'll be able to get credit and buy that dream home.

Constancy is key.

Believe it or not, you can bring your ideas to life without changing everything at once. It’s that important first step that can move you in the right direction. Small things, such as building a new habit over time, can go a long way toward your success.

Whatever tiny changes you make, turn them into habits. It's not enough to put money aside for a month or two. A house costs a lot more than that. Instead, save money every month for one year, three years, or five years. Commit to those years and celebrate the milestones as you achieve them.

If you feel like giving up, remember why you started in the first place. Focus on your end goal and remind yourself that everything you do brings you another step closer to the destination. Don't give up - your hard work will pay off. It's just a matter of time.

Small actions lead to big changes.

Taking the first step is always the hardest. It’s not uncommon to see people never do what they have in mind just because they’re too afraid to begin. New experiences come with a dose of fear. Not everyone is willing to let go of their fear and take on a new challenge. Be assured, though, that if you want to succeed, you must embrace the unknown and take risks.

No matter what you're trying to achieve, taking the first step can be terrifying. You might think:

    • What if I fail?

    • How will I make money?

    • What will people think?

    • What if I’m no good?

    • What if it's not the right time to do it?

    • Am I ready for this?

The truth is there is no guarantee that you'll succeed. But you'll never know how well it's going to turn out unless you try. Do you want to spend the rest of your life wondering "what if?”

That first step is always the hardest because it requires you to embrace the unknown and face your fears. It's also the most important step - without it, nothing will change.

My final thoughts.

Take a baby step to change your life. Most times, it's the smallest things that have the greatest impact on our lives. Small things take time to accumulate and build. It takes perseverance and dedication. You needn’t have everything figured out from day one. What you need is a goal and the courage to do one little, minuscule thing to get started.

Later, take another step and then another, and so on. Stop waiting for the perfect moment to get started. Stop overanalyzing and just go for it! The best time to begin is now.

For more information on how to establish a new change, read this post.

Small Changes Over Time Equal Big Results

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Try Something New In Your Life

Gram’s Wisdom 39

Are you still growing? You don’t need to be at retirement age, to try something new. It could be you just want to make a change. What does it mean to try something new? For some, it may mean learning a new sport. For others, it could be trying new food. Whatever it means to you, the principle is the same for everyone: trying new things expands your world, opening your eyes, and heart to new possibilities, and that’s a great thing.

I spent a lot of time inside my head as a child. So, Gram would say “you’re more capable than you think, but you’ll never know it if you don’t try something new”. She was right, as usual.  You see, once you begin trying new things, you’ll uncover new things about yourself that you never knew before. You may have a hidden talent or a secret interest that can be transformed into something big.

My Gram believed expanding your world to be the single most overarching benefit of trying new things. She was good at combining a growth mindset (my term not hers) with travel and an intense interest in people to touch the lives of others. But since the years when Gram was teaching me to stretch, not stagnate myself, I have found other things to combine with growth that has benefits.

Growth comes from discomfort and loss of control.

When you step out of your comfort zone and into the wilderness of the unknown, a crazy thing happens. You learn and grow as an individual. It may not always be easy or comfortable, but it undoubtedly expands your mind and makes you aware of the possibilities life has to offer.

It’s a dichotomy because, in some respects, you lose control. Trying something new puts you in a vulnerable place—you’re not always sure what will happen, and you’re not 100% in control of the situation. But at the same time, losing control teaches you how to have control over the things you CAN control.

Ditch the excuses, raise the level of your courage.

In the past, you may have said something like, “No, I’ll try that next year,” regarding something new. An excuse can be an easy way out. It’s a coping mechanism, and it’s a sign of weakness. Courage is defined as the ability to do something that frightens you. Chances are, you may be a little frightened by the idea of trying something new – and that’s perfectly okay! But as you begin to try more new things, you’ll feel less inclined to make up excuses. It will boost your courage and stoke you with the confidence you need to tackle new things in the future.

Boredom can be your enemy.

Most people don’t like to be bored. You may enjoy quiet time or relaxation breaks, but being bored is a different story. The good news is it’s hard to be bored when you’re always mixing up your life with new adventures and events. The next time you feel a twinge of tedium tugging at you, try something new instead of endlessly scrolling on your phone. You’ll be surprised at how quickly you’ll get rid of the dull feeling!

It's exciting to find you like something new. It’s even better when you become skilled at it. Once you conquer one new thing, it feels like you can take on the world. You may begin with something small, like learning how to paint, and the next thing you know, you’ll be trying to learn a new instrument and master a new language.

Take your time when trying something new.

Trying something new doesn’t mean a quick experiment and washing your hands of the adventure right afterward. Trying something new is a whole adventure, and it should be enjoyed not rushed. Some things are hit or miss. You may not love everything you try, but you’ll undoubtedly find some activities, people, or interests that you never knew you could appreciate.

The next time someone invites you to do something a little different, you may want to consider saying yes. Trying something new teaches you that it’s been done before by others. You’re not alone in this adventure and the worst-case scenario is that you learn you don’t like it – and that’s not so bad, is it? So, go for it! Try it out and see what you can learn about yourself. You can always reach out to others for support and help in your venture.

There are opportunities to serve others in the new.

So, you try something, and you fall on your face – the bright side is that you earn a sense of humility. Pick yourself up and try again. Putting yourself out there takes guts and makes it that much better when you hit the bullseye. Sure, there will be failures, but it’s worth it to be able to celebrate your big wins. Make the most of your accomplishments.

People are vetted on their abilities to handle life and create exciting experiences for themselves. You can be that person. You can serve as a role model for new growth and opportunities for someone else, put yourself out there, and show them how it’s done!

Try something new = learn something new. Until you try, you won’t know how many opportunities there are.

Seven common things to add to your life.

When you’re ready to embark on a quest to find new, things here are some things to try.

1.  Blogging

Writing may not be your thing, but everyone has a story to tell, and people love stories. In your spare time, try out a blog to document what’s going on in your life. You can make it specific to your interests or your career, or you could keep it wide open for whatever thoughts dance through your mind.

2.  Cooking

Cooking gets a bad rap for being time-consuming, messy, and demanding. We may not all be a wizard in the kitchen, but every once in a while, it’s fun to create a big meal for yourself (or your friends and family). If this doesn’t sound appealing to you, then how about learning some kitchen shortcuts.

3.  Dance Lessons

It’s always a good idea to get your body moving when you can, and it’s an even better idea to move your body to music! When you’re itching to do something new, try out a new form of dance. It’s creative and active at the same time – win-win!

4.  Gardening

The best part about having your own garden is eating the food. Pair that with your cooking endeavor, and you’re set! The only caveat to gardening is that you must have enough space for one. But if you do, it’s well worth it to start growing your fruits, veggies, and herbs. Exercise, fresh air, and a chance to be in touch with mother nature make gardening into a pot of gold.

5.  Hiking

Depending on where you live, you may have forests nearby or mountains may be fully accessible to you. If that’s the case, you should take advantage of it by going on hikes regularly. It gets your blood pumping and gives you all kinds of beautiful sights to see. Hike alone or with some friends.

6.  Learn a New Language

Spare time should never become wasted time. You know that language you were always dying to learn? Seize extra time as the perfect opportunity to begin practicing. You’ll become multilingual before you know it!

7.  Meditation

At first glance, meditation may seem like the opposite of exciting. It’s calm, soothing, and super quiet. But that doesn’t mean it can’t be exciting, too! Meditation is an art and a historically backed practice. Many meditation websites have simple beginner meditations. Begin by trying one out for five minutes a day and see how you like it.

My final thought

What comes to mind when someone tells you to try something new? Are you eager to jump in and try it out, or are you afraid of possible unfavorable outcomes? See, most people get scared away by the thought of trying something they’ve never tried before. So, before you throw the idea away out of hand, spend a few moments considering what you could gain if you give it a try.

For more information, check out these posts.

Keep Trying New Things - No Matter What

An Opportunity To Push Back At Accepted Wisdom

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Get That Gratitude Feeling

Gram’s Wisdom 36

My Gram taught me how to get along in the world. She believed gratitude and thankfulness were the beginning of everything good. That if you were grateful for all you had and thanked others for the things they do for you, good fortune would follow.

Once, Gram told me happiness was obtained from gratitude. That was enough to convince me. I saw how happy and content she was, and I knew that was what I wanted in my life.

Gram had a positive outlook on life and saw the best in everyone, never speaking badly of anyone. She never took anyone for granted. Consequently, she had many friends of all ages.

One of the things Gram would always do when I called or visited was to tell me what she felt grateful for that day. Gram was appreciative of everything big and especially of the small. I learned from her that expressing gratitude out loud nudges others to do the same and offers a huge thank you to the universe.

Learn to speak the language of gratitude.

Practicing gratitude is an excellent habit. Gratitude holds the key to life's greatest abundance, instantly increasing positivity and happiness. Fortunately, gratitude is not something you are born with or without — and that is wonderful — because nearly everyone has a shot at unlocking gratitude's limitless abundance and joy.

Grateful people speak a language that includes words like blessings, abundance, givers, good fortune, and gifts. They concentrate on what others have done for them, rather than on what they do for others.

With more practice, gratitude is something anyone can grow, and it makes life better in so many ways. However, that doesn't mean it will be simple or easy to do, especially for people who are not familiar with speaking the language of gratitude.

Are you lacking gratitude?

According to Albert Einstein, "there are only two ways to live your life. One is as though nothing is a miracle. The other is as though everything is a miracle." Let's classify the former as a complainer and the latter as a grateful person. Since gratitude is a mindset, a complainer has a negative mindset whereas one who is grateful has a positive mindset. Regardless of who you are your go-to responses direct your life in so many ways.

People who complain, instinctively criticize, see multiple reasons why something won't work, are overly preoccupied with the lives of other people, tend to feel envy, easily feel sad, blame others, and often feel angry and frustrated.

How to be grateful in life.

Grateful people, genuinely feel happier with their lives no matter how small or simple a blessing is; they are sensitive to recognizing the good things around them. Because they are predisposed to feel gratitude, they are also more positive, appreciative, have better relationships and connections with others, do not need flashy things to feel good, and are generally more resilient when challenges arise.

There's a big difference in the way people who complain vs. people who are grateful think and behave. That is where cultivating gratitude becomes very important. Gratitude is the path to the bright side of life, whereas complaining, finding fault, making excuses, fear, and a whole range of negative emotions tend to come too easily for many of us. Humans are naturally wired with a negative bias.

The whole point of gratitude is to go beyond our naturally limited ways of thinking to unlock greater abundance, happiness, hope, and more positivity in our lives. But if you don't speak the language of a particular position, it can be very difficult to understand the people who do and speak it yourself. This is the same way with gratitude. You need to learn and practice speaking the language of thankfulness to become a more grateful person.

Here are 7 great ways to become more grateful each day:

Be present now.

Gratitude begins by being entirely present now. This simple precept means you have a strong awareness of the here and now, rather than what is gone (past) and what is yet to be (future), which causes a change in perception. From there, all your senses can appreciate and see everything more clearly, unhindered by worries about what is yet to be and negative emotions about what is already gone.

A gratitude journal can rewire your brain.

Maintaining a gratitude writing habit in a journal keeps the momentum of gratitude going. Having a journal to write your gratitude list every day or as often and consistently as possible rewires your brain, making you more prone to gratefulness.

List what you are grateful for daily.

If you have already begun a gratitude journal, writing letters of gratitude or a simple gratitude list every day can boost the momentum. According to research, it takes just 8 weeks of consistent gratitude practice to begin realizing the benefits of gratitude training and rewire the pattern of your brain to be more prone towards gratitude and positivity.

Begin your day with a goal to be grateful.

Being deliberate is always key, and such is the case with gratitude, too. Begin each day with the correct mindset; find at least one thing you're grateful for and focus on that. Write it down, keep it with you, and let your grateful thoughts permeate your consciousness throughout the day.

Look at the world from a new perspective.

A crucial step to being more appreciative is learning to live out of your bubble. Look for different perspectives. Get creative and move out of your comfort zone. Meet and mingle with people from a different group than you're accustomed to. Learning new perspectives will open your mind to seeing things and people differently and valuing what you have more.

Walk in another’s shoes.

Putting yourself in another person's shoes leaves you with a changed viewpoint, so you're able to see life differently, more clearly, and hopefully, better.

Find gratitude in hard times.

"It takes sadness to know happiness," according to one famous quote. Forgetfulness is one of the main reasons why people are not as grateful as they should be. Oftentimes, people forget those who helped them through obstacles; other times, people forget, or never learned, the lessons behind a difficult journey.

Remembering the hardships that you went through and how you overcame them causes you to appreciate what you have at present better. This helps you become a more grateful and humble person.

My final thought:

Don’t save your gratitude just for the big things that occur in your life. If you want to be truly grateful, don’t be picky. There is nothing too insignificant to be thankful for. You should appreciate everything, from your health to morning coffee and the birds who freely sing their gratitude.

For more information, read these posts:

13 Ways to Be Grateful for What You Have

What Are You Feeling Grateful for Today

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Believe In Yourself

Gram’s Wisdom 34 Believing in you

Should you believe in yourself? The plain answer is no one else will. Try accomplishing anything, and guess what? You will have an uphill climb to your goal. Sure, you will get there eventually, but any doubts you have will make it much more difficult than it needs to be.

You can’t do everything yourself. At some point, you are certain to need the help of someone for something. If you don’t believe in yourself, how will you ever convince others that they can or should?

I think I must have been 12 or 13 when my Gram thought I was old enough to absorb this lesson. This was a tough one for me. I honestly didn’t believe in myself. But I had believed in her all my life.

Gram told me if you believe in yourself, there is little that can stop you from doing whatever you want to accomplish. It gives you the ability to push forward and to defy the odds.

You will be able to handle any hurdles that come your way. You will also be able to disregard the pessimists. It gives you peace of mind when you stick to your self-belief.

A firm belief in yourself can work wonders

It’s vital to believe in yourself

Your spouse and your family will believe in you to a certain degree. However, when times get tough, family support tends to wane. It’s not that they don’t love and care about you. It’s just they stopped believing in you or your dream/goal. While this doesn’t always occur, it often occurs enough to cause disagreement.

When a spouse or parents initially give you support for a new enterprise, there is excitement in the air; they tell you to give it your best shot. When the undertaking doesn’t work out as they believe it should, they begin to question whether you should continue with it. If your belief weakens, you may take on their way of reasoning.

That time is exactly the moment that you shouldn’t stop. People don’t get ahead by quitting. Your belief in yourself should equip you with the ability to tell your friends and family to have some faith. A firm belief in yourself would give you the courage to stand up to them.

Maintaining self-belief takes perseverance

The trouble is, the path towards success in these endeavors is not a straight line. Having some bumps in the road is normal. This is what characterizes the success of the enterprise, and the people who take risks. It should be embraced and not feared. Whatever venture you decide to pursue, know that only by continuing will you make it work.

Don’t take the easy way out. Instead, prepare yourself as much as possible for unfamiliar situations. But move forward with a strong belief that you can accomplish what you set out to do.

Self-belief powers your dreams, desires, and goals

To keep that self-belief strong, you need to describe your goals. You wouldn’t expect a contractor to build a house without a blueprint. You, too, need an outline to guide you on how to continue. Too many people skip this step and wonder why they aren’t getting anywhere.

Goals are your direction but moving ahead with them is only done when you believe that it’s possible. The belief is the momentum you need to act. It helps you to concentrate on getting your tasks complete.

Confidence is built on self-belief

You will also build confidence when you have self-belief. It’s an influential tool and others will be attracted to that confidence. They will follow your lead, and you will help show them what is imaginable. When you stumble over obstacles (and you will), that confidence will help you see them through. You will know how to take alternate actions when necessary. The people following you will appreciate that as well.

Accentuate the positive, eliminate the negative

Several negative forces will try to knock you down. You may even find yourself allowing it to happen. You need to remain focused on why you began your journey in the first place. Use positive affirmations to support your idea. Be consistent with your affirmations.

Unfortunately, many of the negative forces are going to come from your family and friends. They will see it as helping you prevent blunders. Many people will succumb to this negative pressure and give up.

One way to counteract this is to join groups of like-minded individuals. It can be related to your business, or it can be groups that focus on self-help. These organizations exist to try and drive the negative forces out. It’s a good place to go and receive reassurance from the group.

Attending these groups can sometimes lead to friendships with people where you can extend the encouragement of each other. You may even form business collaborations from these friendships. It’s good to know that you have the support of these people when these relationships form. They understand when everyone else around you don’t. Your self-belief will strengthen considerably from this arrangement.

Find others who can motivate and inspire you

The motivation of others can bolster belief in yourself

Think back to a time when someone inspired you. It could be a conference you attended or saw online. You might have read a profile of someone you admired. Whatever the case, the motivation of others can strengthen how you see yourself.

The internet gives us plenty of opportunities to view the stories of high-profile people. Just search on YouTube, and you will find hundreds (if not thousands) of videos of these people sharing their experiences. You will find books covering the same subject. However, there's usually more detail in books rather than in a video. Therefore, you should take advantage of both.

Don’t mistake motivation and inspiration for necessary action 

It’s important to have others who help inspire and motivate you. However, if you place them too high on a pedestal, you may find it difficult to motivate yourself. You begin to suppose these people have an innate ability that you don’t possess. That is counterproductive. You need to recognize they all began the same as you. Some may have had initial advantages, but even people with these advantages don’t always excel. Most people still need to work hard to reach their goals.

Another issue is spending too much time listening or reading about people who motivate you. You must take appropriate action to move ahead with your own goals. It is useful to be motivated by others, but you need to do more than go to seminars or read books. None of that matters unless you put in the effort yourself. Once that happens, others may come to you one day to say how you helped motivate them.

My final thought

Self-belief is one of the most valuable things you can do for your life and yourself. It’s not easy to think positively about yourself when you are besieged on all sides by negativity. But to believe in yourself is certainly worth any effort you make.

For additional information, please read this post by Soul Salt.

How to Believe in Yourself

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