Commit Yourself To Perpetual Joy

Gram’s Wisdom 19: Joy, it isn’t a little thing

My Gram helped me to understand that joy in life is about the little moments, the little things, the little conversations, the little kindnesses. They are mostly seen as minutiae moments, if you’re not looking, they can pass you by without you even noticing. Rather, Gram told me, they are the keys to the kingdom. When you get to experience those moments in all their fullness you will never want to go back to the mundane. It is in those somewhat rare moments when you feel your heart light up, you feel the warmth of your soul set ablaze. That is when joy is almost touchable.

Joy, as l see it, is a condition of your heart. It is an intrinsic feeling, formed and nurtured in you followed by it pouring out of you, it is like a river fed from different sources, it continues overflowing to the outside as long as the source feeds it, but when the source dries up or is restricted the flow ends as well. To keep the flow moving, the source needs to be kept abundant.

Many activities feed your joy, they might differ from person to person, but some are universal. The more you incorporate such things into your day to day living the more those twinkling moments of intensified joy will become an all-day, everyday thing, the joy will just keep gushing out!

What are your sources of joy?

To be able to know your sources it takes mastery of self, when you spend time with yourself digging into your utmost feelings you will learn what feeds your fire. Looking at it this way you become the protagonist of your joy, you decide to be joyful and to do what makes you joyful. You become the artist of your joy.

I am going to relate nine activities that can serve as resources to feed and energize your joy, activities that keep you grounded and in alignment with your inner self and during the process get rid of all mental turmoil thus giving you peace and calm which in turn births joy.

1.      Meditation to calm both mind and body

Joy and mental health cannot be separated, when you have good mental health joy becomes a plus. When your mind is troubled, you are stressed and all anxious you find it hard to relax or to tap into your magic for life, your inspiration.

When you meditate you allow yourself to quiet your mind and access some facets and layers of yourself that you have not discovered yet. It gives you peace of mind, a moment of serenity as you harness your thoughts and focus within, which is where joy is brewed.

2.      An attitude of gratitude

When you are thankful you automatically focus on the positive, you see the bright places even when the whole world seems to be grey. A grateful heart shifts your mind to another perspective of life, you stop judging and complaining at every turn and you open your mind to all the good things happening around you.

Find something to be grateful for each morning, just the fact that you are breathing, seeing the sunrise, hearing the chirping birds, that could be enough to power your spirit of gratitude which will feed your joy for the rest of the day.

In the evening make it a part of your routine to look back on your day and remember what you were grateful for; if possible, make a list or better yet begin a gratitude journal. When you master the art of being grateful even in difficult moments you will always have a source of joy.

3.      Random acts of kindness

The thing with joy is that it has a moral compass, it is not just about the feel-good moments, it goes deeper. When we give joy and love to others it is somehow given back to us, we feel it in our insides. When you help a stranger, volunteer at a shelter, make someone laugh you find yourself more joyful than when you spend the day trying to figure out how to make yourself happy without having shared the gift.

Start a wave of love, of joy-giving everywhere you are by doing a random act of kindness to a stranger; when you start the ripple, it goes on and on from one person to the next. Imagine what a colorful world that would be, one colored with love and joy all over.

4.      Expand your life

As a naturally inquisitive species, we feed on an adventure. Learning something new daily or getting additional information on what you already know and enjoy can be an enormous source of joy. Try new things, travel, and visit new places. Begin a new hobby, monotony dulls your brilliant mind. Increase your involvement in something you love. Leap, l mean what is the worst that could happen, you find out you are not good at painting, well try hiking instead. There is immense joy in learning and trying new things.

5.      Find your purpose

Your purpose is a reason to be, it gives you something to look forward to, something bigger than yourself and we all need to be of use. When responsibility aligns with your passion, the purpose is found. Discover what lights you up, know your passion, that is the primary step. Take responsibility for that passion, daily give yourself tasks to complete. If you love writing, write something daily.

6.      Dance for no reason

There are just those little things that bring an immense feeling of joy when you come across them. We often call them breathtaking. For some, it might be bright colors, sunset pictures, nature. In ways, these things are somehow a representation of the aesthetics of joy- abundance, renewal, and celebration. Incorporate these small effects into your daily living, paint your room a bright color, dance for no reason, or blow bubbles if you want to.

7.      Take action toward a goal, an inspiration, or an epiphany

Commitment gives off a feel-good factor; when you take a step toward your goal you feel good about yourself. Find moments of inspiration from talking to strangers, taking a walk in the park. Leap towards your goal even if you fail you will still find joy in the exercise of trying.

Decide to be joyful, be intentional about your daily activities, and choose those that feed into your joy stream.

8.      Treat yourself with love

Treat yourself right, give yourself a break when it’s needed. Take yourself on a spa date, eat that meal you love. Show yourself the care you would give to others. When you are cared for, you are joyful.

9.      Spend time with the people you love

These people often bring out the best version of us and joy spreads. So, spending time with family and friends is often a reboot to your joy.

My final thought

I truly feel that joy like happiness or optimism can and should be chosen by design. To wait on any of them to occur in a big way by accident is to miss out on all the little moments you can choose to create perpetual joy for yourself and by extension to those around you.  

I hope you liked this post and share it with your family and friends.

Mindfulness Relationship Exercises

Gram’s Wisdom 18: Relationships, mindfulness, and couples

My Gram and Grandpa frequently did little things for one another. He always took care of her car. She just had to get in and drive. But what sent Gram over the moon was the fresh oyster stew he would cook for her twice or three times a year. We lived in a small landlocked Indiana town, so he got big brownie points for that. She in turn would shovel snow occasionally from the house to the garage when he had to go to work in the middle of the night.

In the last several weeks, my honey, Michael, and I have been, like so many others, doing home improvement projects. As I wrote in a previous post Gram was not a big advocate of spending vacation time for that. Still, with four dogs and the current situation, vacation seems far off at this time.

None the less a couple of the projects were done with me, specifically in mind. To make me happy and relieve my worry. My Gram would have said this was mindfully done with an open heart.

I will place links at the bottom of this post to both of those previous posts.

 Pay attention to your relationship

It’s no lie that a good relationship is hard work. People are busy with life and simply neglect to nurture their union. Usually, it turns into a conflict for the time between family, work, and self-care. With all that happens in a day or even a week, what’s left-over for maintaining a relationship? Exactly that, leftovers.

Unintentionally, we often overlook giving our partner what is necessary for a healthy relationship. Mindfulness for a couple is used mainly in couples counseling sessions by professionals. But why wait until there’s so much agitation between you that couch time in a therapists’ office becomes necessary? There are plenty of practices you could initiate now!

Let’s take a look at the mindfulness concept. In a nutshell, the practice of mindfulness is being present in the moment. Becoming aware of the situation at hand and accepting, without judgment, what’s happening. It might sound complicated but it’s rather simple, it just takes practice.

How does mindfulness benefit a relationship?

Mindfulness actions for a couple are much the same as for you alone. Only with your partner. No, not necessarily breathing exercises (although a deep breath where you think before you speak is always a good thing) but there are plenty of other exercises you can do with your mate that will help develop a greater understanding of their emotional state.

Waiting until you are in the middle of a screaming match before trying to meaningfully communicate can be less than effective. But by that point, who is willing to listen, when words go flying and feelings get mutilated? Frequently this is followed by regret and hopefully an apology or (shudder) even the silent treatment; neither of which are truly healthy.

“When we get too caught up in the busyness of the world, we lose connection with one another - and ourselves.”

— Jack Kornfield

So, let’s take a look at some specific mindfulness for couple’s techniques that might be useful:

A daily affirmation

It’s one thing to tell your love that you appreciate something they are doing or have done, but when you give them your undivided attention, look them in the eyes and follow the affirmation with how it makes you feel, it is far more appreciatively received, and it sticks.

To go a step further, your partner would effectively reiterate what you’ve just told them in their own words. For example, “I love it when you rub my back after a long day at work; it makes me feel like you’ve seen that I’m tense and want to help.” Your partner would then follow-up with his interpretation of what you’ve just relayed.

A mindful date night

Sounds simple enough right? But there are rules! Put your devices down if you are enjoying a meal together, look one another in the eyes, and engage in meaningful conversation. Avoid topics that would cause critique or conflict. Open your ears and listen to what your partner is saying without thinking of an immediate response while they are still talking. Then acknowledge that you have sincerely heard what was said.

If you go to a movie or a play, hold hands while sitting, share the same popcorn and soda, and then talk about your opinions on the show afterward. Any event will work and if you don’t share the same ideas on what you should do, alternate venues.

He wants to see a movie and you want to have dinner on the beach. Easy. One thing this week, the other next week. Be excited to spend quality time with one another and fully engage, mindfully, and purposefully. Whatever you do, don’t skip out on your mate and reschedule!

Most importantly, if it’s not “your thing”, don’t disassociate. Make an extra effort to consciously focus on your partner and fully participate in the event. Make new memories. That is what mindfulness is and does.

Memories and mindfulness

Sit down with your loved one and create a list of things that make each of you happy and deliriously in love. Remember when you were dating, and he brought you flowers or when she would nibble on your ears? Write. It. Down.

Use a list or even cut these suggestions out on strips of paper and place them in a jar. Each week grab one out and do it. Suggestions? Hold hands while watching TV. Bring a surprise home after work; a candy bar, a new perfume, a flower you picked from the neighbor’s yard… anything, but make sure it’s sincere.

Write a love note to your partner. Be specific about what it is you love about him/her. Cook and serve a favorite meal. Grocery shop together. These things are simple but can mean the world to your lover and your relationship.

Mindfulness for couples doesn’t mean you must gaze into each other’s eyes and affirm your undying affection. There are endless “exercises” you could include in your daily lives that will create mutual love and adoration. And when you are mindful of your love and adoration guess what happens? You are less likely to explode during the difficult conversations inevitable in any relationship.

Engage mindfully with your partner

Engaging your conscious mind to be more mindfully aware of loving and being loved will move your relationship from a should be/could be/would be existence to a “this is” experience.

You both will subconsciously reflect on how loved you are and that you are in this together, thus creating a stronger bond and much greater respect for your mate. It’s a win-win! Don’t stop with these few suggestions though. Find what works best in your relationship and for your given situation.

You wouldn’t neglect to give yourself food or water, right? Relationships take continuous work and nurturing as well. Mindfulness for a couple is work, yes, but it’s so worth it! Give your partnership the fuel it deserves to grow and succeed!

My final thought

I think this all boils down to attention, awareness, and presence. Our lives get busy and it becomes a catch-all excuse. We shouldn’t allow that most important person in our life to feel as if we no longer see them, hear them, or care enough to spend quality time with them.

Here are the links to the posts I mentioned above.

How Mindfulness Helps You Enjoy the Journey 

Simple Love and Care Advice for Couples

Thank You for reading this post and I hope you will share it with your family and friends.

Create Your Intentional Life

Live with intention or by default

There’s much talk about intentional living lately. But what does this mean? Intentional living is consciously living in alignment with your values and beliefs.

It’s opposite to what many people do. They live in default mode, being satisfied to only take action when disasters occur.

Intentional living is about an awareness of who you want to be and how you want to live. Of making that choice and then being disciplined enough to do it consistently.

How to live your life intentionally

Take the time, take control of your life, and make decisions that matter. Not to your Mom or your best friend. Matter to you.  Choose the course for your life or life will make those choices for you. And those choices will likely be haphazard and unpleasant. In other words, take control while you still have time to create an exciting life or one of peace and calm if that is your preference.

Try these 10 tips to help you live with intention:

1 | Your choices matter. An intentional life is all about making choices that make sense for you and your beliefs. Determine the kind of life you want to lead and direction you want to take that will create the results you want. Change as necessary life isn’t static.

But choose. Your past needn’t be an issue. You may have been afraid to make a choice and fail. It’s true, you can’t fail if you never try. You don’t want to make an incorrect choice. However, this thinking is a trap. You should make a reasonable choice and give it your best effort. Without it, you may not experience the success and happiness that you deserve.

Your greatest power is the power of decision.

“It’s not hard to make decisions when you know what your values are.”

— Roy Disney

2 | Visualize your dream life in detail. Have a target in mind. Think about how you’d like to live. Be bold-spirited and leave your doubts and limitations behind for a moment. Go for broke it’s your life.

Consider your ideal day. How would you like to spend your time? Who else would be there? Where would you live? What would your finances be like? Does it include travel or education? Give it some thought. Write it down in a journal or a piece of paper. Refer back to it often.

3 | Know your values and beliefs. A large part of intentional living is living aligned with your values and your beliefs. It’s not about reacting to everything in the most expedient fashion. It’s about proactively living on your terms. It’s necessary to be intimately familiar with your beliefs and values to accomplish that.

4 |Prioritize the first things first. Money isn’t the main thing, but it’s an important thing. Money is great for solving many of life’s challenges such as food and housing. It’s also a necessary resource that affords you the ability to do the things you want to do like traveling. If you’re having financial struggles, it makes the most sense to work on your finances first.

Make a logical progression for each part of your life you’d like to change. Your health is key to your enjoyment of life. If you need to lose 100 pounds, going for a daily walk and eliminating high-calorie drinks would be a good beginning. After a month of walking, you could add additional exercise and diet changes.

Focus on financial and health issues first. After you’ve gained some momentum, you can address the other parts of your life.

5 | Set goals for the major areas of your life. These typically include your home, career, relationships, and education. Of course, you can add other categories as you need them, depending on your aspirations and values.

6 | Choose or create habits to support those goals. Intentional living is much easier with supportive habits in place. You’ll run out of willpower otherwise. Select simple, but effective habits that will help you to reach your goals and begin implementing them.

7 | Decide how you will spend your time. Most of us don’t give a lot of thought to what we do each day. Keeping your dreams and values in mind, what is the best thing for you to do at this moment? What do you need to accomplish today? Have you made a plan? Make choices and avoid operating on autopilot.

8 | Master your impulses. Most of our impulses lead us down the wrong path. They’re often habitual and related to pleasure or discomfort avoidance. Intentional living is about making rational decisions and exercising consistent follow through regardless of comfort. Following your impulses are the opposite of intentional living.

9 | Reject distractions. This includes all distracting thoughts of the past or future. Intention requires presence. Distractions are things you shouldn’t be doing at that moment. Even paying your bills can be a distraction if you should be doing something more important at that time.

10 | Take stock of your day. How well did you do today at living intentionally? What challenges did you face? Where did you fall short? What can you do tomorrow even better than you did it today? What win did you have that you can build on? Learn something new each day for the future.

 My final thought

Are you choosing and creating your life or just living by default? Having a life, that you love will never happen by accident. Be courageous enough to choose the life you want for yourself. Decide the kind of person you want to be. Make your decisions and choose your actions accordingly. Remember, when you refuse to make a choice, you have made your choice.

Be present in your life. Be in control of your life. Be happy in your life.

I would appreciate it if you please share this post with your family and friends.

Titanic’s Lingering Lessons

Gram’s Wisdom 16: Titanic Lessons

The original of this post was written two years ago, but it’s as relevant today as it would have been 100 years ago. I have put the link to that post at the bottom for anyone interested. I know I am as like as not going to receive a ration of shit for this post. I don’t mind. I welcome the eye-rolls I receive when I mention Titanic (you Titaniacs out there know exactly what I'm talking about).

My Gram would have called the lessons of the passengers “life learned” lessons. Since then I have noticed that we best remember them when we learn them for ourselves. They can be so easily forgotten when we don’t and frequently to our grief.

Gram took me to see “The Unsinkable Molly Brown” when I was five. She had told me she was almost my age when Titanic sank and that even in rural Indiana it made the news. Now, Debbie Reynold's as Molly, in the movie, was only aboard Titanic and in that lifeboat for about 12 minutes screen-time. I doubt as we sat in that theater that Gram had any idea what a profound effect that movie would have on me. But I have been captive to all things Titanic ever since.

To my five-year-old mind, I thought now, there was a woman who lived her life large, didn’t worry what others thought of her and made a big splash. Yet, when it was most important, she influenced the women of her boat to do the necessary rowing for warmth and safety and kept their spirits high.

Titanic’s lessons were hard, hindsight learned and full of what-ifs. If you are interested in learning more about Titanic, there are books to read and documentaries and movies to view. I have included a couple of suggestions at the bottom for anyone interested.

“There was peace, and the world had an even tenor to its way... Nothing was revealed in the morning the trend of which was not known the night before. To my mind, the world of today awoke April 15, 1912.”

— John B. (Jack) Thayer

As the 108th-anniversary approaches, these are what I observed from Titanic in no specific order

Be calm don’t panic

The musicians aboard the Titanic played to the end. That music helped to keep the passengers’ panic at bay. Panic has you running around no plan in mind and missing the last lifeboat. You make better decisions about where you are and how and where you want to go when you’re calm. More solutions to your problems seem to appear when you quietly and calmly look at them.

Life is a journey

There are beginnings and endings. Don’t rush them. Enjoy the little things. Making memories takes time. Revel in the experiences with people moving along the same path with you. This will be your family and those you choose to be with constantly. Enjoy the time you share with those whom you briefly meet along the way. Take time to appreciate the sights, sounds and smells as you go along. It’s better to see half as much and remember it than to see twice as much and remember nothing.

A life of service, going beyond                                   

The stokers and engineering crew of Titanic remained faithfully at their posts keeping the electricity so vital to the pumps, the elevators, the lights, and the all-important telegraph working. Their selflessness allowed more passengers to safely depart the ship than would have otherwise been possible.

To go beyond is lending that hand or doing that thing when it’s most needed by others. Not when it’s easiest or most convenient for you.

Pay attention to the signs

This one is difficult. Things can and do happen like a bolt out of the blue sometimes and you are unprepared for them. Often some signs are overlooked or ignored. Sometimes you want to bury your head in the sand and pretend nothing bad will happen to you. When you begin to see signs it’s time to plan for the worst and hope for the best.

Strength and perseverance

You don’t always get what you want. Sometimes you just get what you get, and you must make the best of it. People who can do this are strong because it's never easy to make the best of a bad situation. And, the strongest of these people never give up, they persevere no matter the obstacles they face. They see challenges and find ways to go around them or over them because they will not be deterred.

It never pays to believe all the hype

That is just as true today. The Unforeseen happens, things break, people are fallible.

My final thought

All the people on Titanic that night passengers and crew alike were brave and did the best they could with what they had. Each one had no assurance that they would survive. Many assumed such but there were no guarantees. I feel this sums up the biggest lesson we learn from Titanic.

I do have one book recommendation for you if you have no idea where to start reading about Titanic. You can't go wrong with Walter Lord's "A Night To Remember." It's a straight-forward survivor account of what happened on the night of April 14, 1912, when ship meets iceberg. The movie of the same name based on the book is also one of the best there is. My favorite documentary is A & E’s 1994 Titanic The Complete Story.

Here is the link to that 2-year-old post:

Lessons I Learned From The Titanic

I hope you have enjoyed this post. Please share it with anyone you feel would benefit. 

An Opportunity To Push Back At Accepted Wisdom

Why is it so darned wrong to stay in our comfort zone?

Okay. So, I’m shamelessly going to take this opportunity to weigh in on a piece of accepted wisdom that, I don’t know about you, but I get so blasted tired of hearing from people. “You need to get out of your comfort zone,” is shouted at us everywhere.

Why do we stay in our comfort zone? Because our comfort zone is the stress-free zone (this is what I call my home) we are used to. It’s what’s familiar. It’s also the place where we are told we find the most dissatisfaction with our life.

Reliance on your comfort zone

But isn’t it also the place where our valuable routines live? How many of us depend on a morning and an evening routine? Not to mention the mundane but necessary chores of a busy household. Knowing whose turn, it is to feed and walk the dog, removes stress from everyone including the dog.

The same thing goes for our working life. Our workflows, planners, and calendars are comforting. They give us a path to follow, without which, we would waste a lot of valuable time that could be used to tackle additional or more creative projects.  

We are told, when we stay in our comfort zone, we force ourselves to remain stagnant. We’re afraid to change out of fear of facing the unknown. Not always, sometimes we are just catching our breath. Sometimes a calm face shown to the world is advantageous before you bring on the next big thing.

“Your big opportunity may be right where you are now.”

— Napoleon Hill

Recognizing when it’s time for a change  

Staying too long in a comfort zone that no longer serves you can be problematic as well. Especially if you don’t, won’t or can’t recognize that it’s time to change.

These 8 reasons are good possibilities if you want to change your comfort zone.

1.    You’re not reaching your goal. Stay in your comfort zone too long, and you are less likely to follow through on reaching your goal. Your fear, procrastination, or any other excuse you use keeps you from acting on your goal.

2.    Absence of growth. Rigidly remaining in your comfort zone will likely keep you from growing into more than you are right now. You’ll always be stuck, never moving forward and never growing and changing. You may end up not reaching your goals because you’re stuck doing things the way you’ve always done them, even though you don’t see any results. You never step out of your comfort zone to explore what you’re capable of doing or what you could accomplish.

3.    Lost or no passion. Staying in your comfort zone makes it hard for you to discover your passion. Your passion can only be found out of your comfort zone.

4.    You may feel left behind. If you stay in your comfort zone you could feel like you are being left behind by your colleagues and others you relate to. They might have been behind you in terms of your life or career at one time, but because they stepped away from their comfort zone, they have passed you by.

5.    Settling for less. By continuing to live in your comfort zone, you allow yourself to settle for less than you deserve. You put the things you love aside believing you don’t need them or deserve them.

6.    What self-confidence you have may lag. If you don’t move out of your comfort zone, you aren’t building the confidence you need to expand your growth and undertake new challenges.

7.    Your health can suffer. Sometimes when you are not getting out of your comfort zone you might also be neglecting your health. It can be from fear of visiting the doctor, not wanting to alter your routines, avoidance of going to the gym for some reason such as being looked at or trying something different.

8.    You simply hate changes. You are unbending and set in your ways. Your comfort zone is exactly that. Life can be tough enough, throwing all kinds of things at you. Things can happen that will pull you out of your comfort zone even if you don’t want them to. But remaining in your comfort zone keeps you from being open to new possibilities.

My final thoughts

I believe we have many reasons why we stay in any given comfort zone. Most are beneficial and work for us if we have crafted them with care for our own needs. The trick is knowing when that is no longer the case and letting it go so you can develop a new zone of comfort. Staying in your zone may feel comfortable but it’s unfair to limit yourself or to settle for what is merely adequate.

At the time of this post, most of us are in sheltering mode due to the Corona Virus. Our comfort zone is our refuge. Allow yourself changes to accommodate a new normal. Our homes should feel like havens not, prisons.

 I hope you have enjoyed this post. If so, please leave me a comment.

You’re As Strong As You Believe You Are

Gram’s Wisdom 15: Tough both inside and out

My Gram was one of the toughest people I have ever known. Both mentally and physically she radiated strength. I knew I could ask her anything and get a straight answer or I could lean on her when I was weary. All my young life she was teaching me something daily. I got, “this is how you do it lessons” for what I believe she thought were the practicalities of life.

But the older I get the more I appreciate those lessons I learned through my observation. Many of them left a strong impression on my behavior then and continue to shape how I live my life today. Although I consider myself to be strong, I don’t believe I can hold a candle to the strong woman my Gram was.

What I have learned about mental strength 

So many people aren’t as emotionally strong as they wish they were. Our lack of belief in our strength is a huge limiting factor in our lives. If we were a little tougher mentally, we’d be willing to try more, and consequently, we’d accomplish more.

Every obstacle we meet is less likely to be thought insurmountable if we believe we possess a high degree of inner strength.

It’s not necessary to be born mentally tough. You can develop this quality in yourself.

Increase your inner strength and overcome obstacles using these skills

1| Up-level yourself physically.

Inner strength is easier to get if you’re strong in other ways, too

2| Don’t forget body and mind together.

Suffering through a challenging workout is a great way to build your mind and body at the same time. With a strong mind, body, connection, you become unstoppable.

3| Develop your ability to focus.

Inner strength is the ability to focus on what needs to be done regardless of the circumstances. You can’t just decide to focus and suddenly be good at it. You’ve spent a lifetime distracting yourself. It takes time to learn the habit of focusing well for extended periods of time.

4| Be attentive to what you’re doing.

When your attention drifts away, bring it back. Continue to do that until you’re good at focusing.

5| Meditation is another powerful way to learn how to focus.

A daily meditation practice is worth considering if you’re serious about increasing your inner strength.

6| Do something uncomfortable.

You can take a cold shower. Do yard work. Walk up to strangers and begin a conversation. Sing in front of your friends. Dye your hair pink and go grocery shopping. Learning to deal with discomfort is an important part of inner strength.

7| Do tough or difficult things.

Climb a mountain. Run a marathon. Write an entire book. Go an entire day without speaking. Wake up an hour earlier for the next month. Learn a new language. Memorize The Charge of The Light Brigade or your favorite poem.

“It’s worth remembering that the time of greatest gains in terms of wisdom and inner strength is often that of greatest difficulty.”

— Dalai Lama

8| Decide quickly.

Make rapid decisions. It’s weak to postpone making decisions just because you don’t want to take responsibility for your life. Be responsible but make up your mind and own your decisions. Take responsibility for your life.

9| Act on a regular basis.

It’s not enough to decide. You must do something, too. Avoid falling into the procrastination trap of spending too much time researching and planning. Those with inner strength act decisively.

10| What are your past accomplishments?

Remind yourself that you’ve accomplished some impressive things. You’ve overcome obstacles. Also remember that you’re tougher than you thought. Relive those past successes and the obstacles you overcame.

11| Describe your attitude.

Tough, positive, action-oriented, persistent, diligent, committed, aggressive, disciplined. Are these words you would use to describe yourself? How about attaching “I am” at the beginning of each word and turning them into your daily affirmations. What other qualities do you think someone with inner strength possesses?

12| Surround yourself with like-minded people.

You’re stronger when you surround yourself with strong, supportive people. Negative people will sap your inner strength. Weak people will do the same thing. Surround yourself with the right people, and you’ll be better for it.

My final thought

How tough are you? Are you the toughest person you know? If not, you have some work to do. A lack of inner strength is very limiting. Imagine how much more you would do if you could double your inner strength!

You can become mentally stronger if you’re willing to take the appropriate steps. Your stronger self is waiting for you, so do it now!

I sincerely hope you like this post and will share it with the people you love.

How to Help the Universe Manifest Your Blessing?

Allow the universe to manifest your blessing

Before the universe can manifest, what you’ve asked for, it’s up to you to explain exactly what that is. Some people find that visualization of their dreams or desires to be a powerful tool for clarifying what they want. Others use mood boards, while many use the spoken or written word in the form of affirmations. You will be best served when you use the method that suits you.

Why? The better you understand and describe your desire the easier it will be for the universe to assist you in the realization of it.  

Let’s try scripting

When you’re scripting, you can write your script on paper as individual notes or in a journal, or type it on a computer using your favorite note-taking app. The style and form don’t matter. It’s the substance that counts. Don’t worry over every word or phrase. Script from your heart and allow the universe to understand your intention.

These 5 steps can help train you to script

1.  Be specific

Before you write your script, ask yourself what your intentions are. Your understanding of your desire is necessary, if you don’t know what it is, you won’t be able to ask the universe to fulfill it. Vague requests are difficult for the universe to answer.  Your spirit knows what you need, listen to your inner voice.

Asking the universe to be a nicer person is too vague. And asking to smile more is a subjective request. Be clear in your intention by specifying exactly what you want, like smiling and saying a kind word to strangers. Giving the universe a clear request helps you focus on your manifestation

2. What is your reason?

Why do you want this blessing? What are you trying to achieve? Your intention should be clear when you script. How will granting your desire allow the universe to help you?  Knowing the reason, you want something is as important as knowing what you want. Use caution here because blessings are meant to be beneficial, not hurt. If you don’t understand why you want something, you may not be asking the universe for a blessing that will help you.

“Manifestation blossoms when we turn down or tune out doubtful noise.”

— T.F. Hodge

3.  Allow the feeling to wash over you

Scripting takes your desires and makes them manifest by allowing you to feel the blessing. Let your spirit see you with your blessing and ask yourself how it feels to have it. What is your life like now that you have received this gift? The idea of scripting is to put into words what it is like to be blessed.

Consider how this blessing changes your life.

You should feel positive, empowered, and whole. If you don’t feel right having this blessing, you may be letting negative thoughts and emotions cloud your request. If scripting your blessing isn’t bringing you peace and happiness, go back and redefine the clarity and why of your intention

4.  Can you believe it?

If you’re scripting that you smile and say a kind word to strangers, consider the possible benefits. Manifestation makes the impossible, possible, but it doesn’t supplant reality.  Your script needs to be believable for the universe to grant your blessing.

Smiling and saying a kind word to strangers will not automatically make you the boss at your job, Mayor of the city, or a superstar. Keep your scripting believable. You may desire this blessing so you can meet a new friend or partner. Perhaps you want to bring more joy into your life by showing kindness to strangers. Realistic and believable outcomes are the foundation of scripting your manifestation.

5.  Gratitude for your blessings

Once you’ve scripted your new blessing, continue the process by scripting your gratitude for having it. The Law of Attraction brings you what you send out into the universe. Gratitude is a universal current of life. Your blessing may not be as powerful if you don’t take time to be grateful for it. 

Without gratitude, you may lose focus on your manifestation and miss the benefits you’ve been given. Moving too quickly from asking to having to asking for something else is not consistent with the universe’s plan to provide you with everything you need when you need it

My final thought

Scripting helps increase your vibrational energy to bring your manifestations into focus. The Law of Attraction is stronger when you focus on your intentions and get clear about what you are asking from the universe. Scripting is an excellent habit to build as part of your journey. 

Daily scripting can be done every morning or even the night before as you close one day and prepare for the next. Using scripting as a daily habit helps you discover your deepest desires and then send your requests to the universe, knowing you are blessed.

Scripting may be a good choice for you, if like me, you have Aphantasia and are unable to see pictures in your mind’s eye when you try to visualize.

I hope you liked this post. Please share it with your family and friends.

Manifest Your Desires by Taking Action

Gram’s Wisdom 14: Manifestation motivation

My Gram told me if you are motivated enough you can have whatever you desire. This statement probably always came after I said, “gee I wish I had…” Having raised 6 children as a young widow during the depression, I’m sure she knew a lot about what children wished for. But she always took me seriously and would ask me how badly I wanted that thing, and what was I willing to do to get it. Then she would tell me, “you work harder to get what you want when the motivation is there.” But along with the hard work, she believed a good plan was also important. “Without a plan, you are only wishing” is what I was told.

No, she didn’t call it manifestation or law of attraction but that’s exactly what it was.

Manifest your reality

Manifestation is the action you take to create a new reality or accomplish a goal by using the power of your thoughts. But, one of the largest misconceptions and most misunderstood principles of manifesting a dream is that it ONLY involves thinking. In other words, many people believe that, if you think it, it will happen. Or just dreaming something will cause it to appear magically out of thin air.

These misconceptions are why so many remain skeptical of manifestation as a legitimate strategy for improving your life. While your thoughts and beliefs are indeed the foundation for manifesting your goals, without action, they continue to stay in the realm of dreams. Manifestation is about using your ideas to transform your efforts to get what you want. It is about Being, Doing, and Having, not just thinking. Let’s look at how taking action affects your ability to manifest your desires.

“A dream doesn’t become reality through magic; it takes sweat, determination, and hard work.”

— Colin Powell

Your thoughts into action

Whether or not you believe in manifestation, you likely would agree that actions get results. And that those who expend the effort to do something are much more likely to achieve a goal than those who just sit thinking about doing something. After all, if thinking about losing weight worked, the diet book and weight loss market would not exist!

So, there is no denying that by acting in a specific way you can cause a particular outcome. This is known as cause and effect. Do this, cause that. What manifestation theory tells us is that you can indirectly cause things to happen, as well, through using your thoughts, values, and goals. The results are not all arising from a direct cause nor action but by the effects of your focused attention, desires, and intention, which can change how you behave as well as the choices you make.

What you believe and who you are will inform your choice, habits, and behaviors. Therefore, when you want to manifest something, you must believe that you can achieve it, which changes your desire to try, your awareness of opportunities around you that could help you reach your goal, and much more that influences the actions you take.

So, your thoughts can nurture your actions. But does it work the other way around? Yes! When you actively work on attaining your goals, by doing the things that need to be done, you are learning and gaining confidence, which will change your beliefs and inform your values. When you are successful in making progress toward a goal, you want to reach it and become more invested in its success.

Other essential components of manifestation

While your action is an important ingredient in manifesting what you most desire, it is not the most essential component of this powerful process. To manifest your dreams, you must embody the desire; you must believe that you are capable and worthy of achieving it, and you must focus your thoughts and energy on making it come true. Your thoughts and beliefs guide all your actions and choices, so without the right mindset and outlook, your efforts could be wasted or ineffectual.

All the action in the world can’t make you happy and help you accomplish what you most desire unless your mind is ready and willing to accept it. Having clear intentions, positive expectations, and focused values will drive your actions in the right direction and help pave the way to realizing everything you have always wanted.

My final thought

Action is just one of the necessary steps of the manifestation process. You must also have a plan to guide you toward your goal. And, you must believe you can get the results you want if you consistently take action and work your plan.

I hope this post was valuable to you and you will share it with your family and friends.