How Do You Live Intentionally?

Society would have us believe a busy life is a successful one. Our society also shows us that the external is more valuable than the internal. Yet we live in a world where our mental health problems are sky-high. But we have a choice. We can control our lives with intention or allow fate to handle things.

If you think intentional living sounds confusing and complicated, you're probably not alone. It does sound quite daunting, but it's a way of life and you can use it to create a better one. You have maybe seen it discussed online or even overhead people discussing the concept. It's all over the place these days, but what on earth does it mean? What does intentional living look like? Can anyone do it?

Of course! It's simply living your life with purpose. But before you can do that, you must identify what you want your life to look like. The heart of intentional living when you reduce it down to its basics is about living a life that reflects your values and beliefs. It's about directing your life and being proactive instead of being reactive, always fighting against the latest cataclysm.

Living with intention looks different for each person because everyone has different values. For you, it could mean taking long walks with your partner because you prioritize quality time and movement. For your friend, it could be scheduling their favorite activities because their highest value is self-care. Maybe another friend prioritizes spirituality, so they make a habit of going to church every week.

Why does it matter?

There are plenty of benefits to living intentionally. First and foremost, when you live a life of intention you respect your values and beliefs, which has two major interlinked benefits. Intentional living helps improve your mental health and one of the reasons for this is it is an excellent stress management tool.

If you are living a life with a purpose that reflects your deeply held beliefs, you won't need to stress out over every decision because your values act as your north star. And a stress reduction is positive for your mental health. You'll also be much happier, partly because you're less stressed and enjoying better mental health, but also because you will feel more inner peace from the manner with which you are living your life.

All those feed into intentional living. It’s about making conscious choices and acting in a way that aligns with your values. Living with intention gives you control; it helps you show up every day and tap into your inner power. It supports present living by defining the life you want and delivering on it by taking intentional action. It can be profoundly satisfying because it helps you lead a fulfilling life.

What does it look like?

It's important to know that even though it's a powerful choice to make, living intentionally won't bring you endless joy or peace. It isn't always easy, particularly at the start. It will probably be awkward; it might feel challenging. But isn't any major change in your life the same? The more you persevere with it the more it will become second nature.

Why is it so hard at the beginning? Many of your values and beliefs will be a consequence of your upbringing. For many people, it's difficult to process that these values you absorbed from your culture, family, or religion no longer serve or resonate with you. You need to give yourself the space and grace to deal with this at your speed.

The world is all about distraction and that can easily tear you from your intentional journey. You can't let anything deter you from the journey you choose for yourself. You need to learn how to shut out or at least turn down the noise.

Then you need to identify your values because they are the foundation of intentional living. If you already have your values nailed down, then you're ahead of the game. It's worth taking the time to understand why your values are important to you and what activities tie into them. Do they share anything in common?

So, what does intentional living look like? It looks different for everyone, but there are certain tips you can act on regardless of the values that best reflect your beliefs.

Create a morning intention.

Intentional living looks like living your values. It means taking action that aligns with those values and making decisions that reflect your beliefs. It's an everyday practice, and if you decide out of alignment, you can always do better tomorrow. It takes time to get into the swing of things, but if you seek to stay true to your values, you're doing the best you can.

So, how do you take an intention and break it down to daily living? You can start with a morning intention – it can be a sentence or just a few words. It might be a reminder of how you would live to make choices or behave. Make this part of your morning routine and tie it into a ritual like meditation. It will become as routine as a morning cup of coffee in no time.

Awareness and focus.

You don't have to start over, change your entire life, or walk away from everything you know to live intentionally. It’s about living your life with awareness. You can bring intentionality to how you live currently. For example, while you prepare dinner, try to tap into all your senses. When you run errands or do chores try to connect the why.

So, you're washing dishes, so you can provide meals for yourself and your family. You're hanging laundry, ironing, and cleaning to care for yourself or create an organized and peaceful home. You can also pay more attention when you move your body – notice how it feels. And when you exercise, you can tie it into an intention such as choosing yoga to feel more deeply connected to your physical self.

Small variations like this are a useful way to reframe and refocus.

Small changes.

You can create small changes that are done habitually and will eventually make a large impact. Scale back on social media use before bed. Create a morning ritual to connect to yourself and savor quiet time rather than rushing about stressing. Schedule a weekly call or meet up with friends to nurture your relationships.

Recount your day.

You begin your morning with intention, and you should end the day similarly. Bedtime is an excellent opportunity to recount the way your intention contributed to your day. You may, or may not choose, to journal this; you can simply think about them. If your number one value is compassion, then you can quietly think about all the times you were compassionate throughout the day.

What do you want in life?

If that isn't enough to convince you to live an intentional life, check out these 5 additional reasons.

1 | Presence

Living with awareness forces you to focus on the here and now, which means you notice what brings you joy and what doesn't.

You begin to get a grip on what lights your fire and fuels your motivation. It naturally makes you more present and the more present you are, the more awareness you develop.

2 | Improved relationships.

Living intentionally obliges you to take responsibility for what you can control and let go of what you can't. Improved relationships are a natural by-product. Intentional living forces accountability.

3 | Healthy boundaries.

Self-confidence is key when it comes to establishing and maintaining healthy boundaries. You feel comfortable enough to say no when you're running low on time or energy.

You stop feeling guilty about saying yes to the things that serve you. You start to recognize toxic relationships that drag you down. That's the perfect recipe for setting and maintaining boundaries that serve you well.

4 | Improved mental health.

By shining a spotlight on your mental health. You notice just how important it is to take care of your emotional wellness.

Self-care is an important component of good mental health. The trickle-down effect touches every other part of your life.

5 | Improved physical health.

Stress is one of the biggest risk factors for poor health.

Intentional living is an excellent way to reduce your stress levels. Focusing on the present helps block out a lot of stress you have about past mistakes and your future.

With the improvement in your mental health, your physical health is bolstered.

My final thoughts.

Intentional living is a holistic lifestyle and once you start to embrace it, you will begin to see all the benefits listed above. I believe your objective in life should be to serve your values and pursue joy, living intentionally is a perfect way to unlock that.

So, what are you waiting for? Give it a try. Begin living intentionally today.

For more information, please read these posts.

An Intro To Intentional Living How Not To Live On Auto-Pilot

Create An Intentional Life Using These 10 Tips

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Your Thoughts Create Your Reality

Thoughts are the basic mindset of life

You hear it everywhere: you are what you think. And those thoughts become your beliefs, your values, and yes, your mindsets.

Depending on your thoughts or the situation, this can be good or bad. Running away from a growling animal chasing you is a smart thing. Jumping fearfully anytime you hear a dog bark; probably isn’t good for your blood pressure.

Nonetheless, you can’t argue with the fact that many of the great minds of our time agree that thoughts are the building blocks of life experiences. To put it simply, the circumstances of your life are reflections of the way you think.

The difficulty begins when you believe that material things can make you happier. You buy into the notion that bigger, newer, and shinier, expensive things can make your life better. Some people even feel that mind-numbing substances help them to forget their reality or more easily accept it.

The truth is that you can construct a better reality for yourself by producing a change from the inside. Your thoughts are the driving force behind why you feel and act the way you do. Once, you learn to control your thoughts, feelings, and actions, understanding the link between those three, you can begin living the life you want in the way you want it.

Three life-altering tips

Incorporate these three tips into your day to help you alter negative thought patterns to positive ones. Now, let’s begin.

1. Identify flawed thought patterns

Most of our beliefs and thoughts tend to be more on the negative side. This narrative has you feeling responsible for most of what is wrong in your life. Consequently, you feel powerless and out of control. These flawed thought patterns can lead to mental disorders like anxiety and depression.

Gregory Walton, an Associate Professor of Psychology, said, “The most proximate determinant of how people behave is how they understand things, and you can change that.”

Here are some of the more common negative patterns of thought many of us suffer from. Get a pen and paper and write down which of them you most relate to. Once you’ve identified them, you can start to transform them from the negative to the positive.

• Minimizing achievements and maximizing simple errors

• All-or-nothing opposite thinking

• Generalizing people and situations

• Filtering out positive statements and focusing only on the negative

• Mind Reading- Make negative interpretations of what others say

2. Encourage healthy practices

When you do something repeatedly, it becomes a habit. The more you do it, the more likely you’ll continue doing it in the future.

Thought patterns are the same way. The more you think in a particular way, the more you’ll likely continue thinking about it the same way, repeatedly. Soon enough, it’ll start to consume your day-to-day living.

The science behind it is that each thought ignites a chemical reaction in your brain. This reaction then triggers a certain emotion. As a result, your emotions send a signal to your body, and you react accordingly.

This cycle repeats itself until you realize you’re not living the life you want for yourself. You can’t even recognize who you are anymore. An apropos quote by John Frederick Demartini, is, “Your innermost dominant thoughts become your outermost tangible reality.”

It’s then that you should decide to make a change. Recondition yourself by recognizing negative thoughts and how they affect your emotions.

The act of thinking about your thoughts and understanding the patterns behind them is what psychologists refer to as metacognition. It’s one of the best ways to find out what’s causing your thought patterns.

As with most things, reconditioning your thoughts takes time. Ready yourself for a few bumps along the way, but stick with it.

You’ll soon realize; it’s the only way to become aware of the link between your thoughts, emotions, and behavior. Only then will you be able to reclaim control and live the life you deserve.

3. Pursue Cognitive-behavioral therapy

Cognitive-behavioral therapy (CBT) is an effective tool for dealing with certain mental disorders. This type of therapy focuses on the idea that our thoughts, behavior, and emotions are all linked.

The best thing about CBT is it’s all about your present, rather than focusing solely on past events. After all, it was James Allen who wrote, “You are today where your thoughts have brought you; you will be tomorrow where your thoughts take you.”

Through CBT, you learn how to challenge negative thoughts and behaviors. CBT is also unique in that it assigns practical work outside each session. It’s a great way to see first-hand how thoughts influence behavior and start to live intentionally.

Check out some of the most common CBT strategies:

• Exposure: Face your fears to confront and overcome stress and apprehension rather than avoiding them.

• Mindfulness: Focusing on the present moment through steady breathing and your five senses.

• Skills training: Practice skills to promote positive behavioral changes through role-playing, modeling, and mock scenarios.

The takeaway

Now, it’s time for a little challenge. Become more conscious of your thoughts, both the good and the bad.

Negative thoughts hold you back from living life to the fullest. They keep you chained in an exhausting loop of self-doubt, fear, and panic.

On the other hand, positive thoughts make you feel good about yourself. They uplift your mood, boost your motivation, and encourage you to work hard.

So, work on rewiring your brain to think happy, positive thoughts. Getting started may be tough in the beginning, but it’s worth it in the long run. Your future self will thank you.

My final thought

This may be counter-intuitive, but hear me out. I have a sunny disposition. I am a happy and positive thinker most of the time. But, occasionally, and in small doses, a little negativity can be useful if it prods you into positive action.

For example, you ask yourself why when you see others getting promotions, and you’re stuck in the same old place. That small dose of negativity can spur you on to learn a new skill or come up with the next great idea. Now, you too have earned the deserved promotion.  

Thanks for reading this post, please share it with your friends and family.

For other slants on this topic, read below.

When And How Thoughts Affect Your Reality

Acting The Way You Want To Feel